Top 10 Signs You’ve Had TOO MUCH Candy

Top 10 Signs You’ve Had TOO MUCH Candy

by Gina Valley

It’s the most candy-centric time of the year.

There’s candy everywhere you look.

People are talking about candy. People are buying candy. People are eating candy. People are dropping candy wrappers on the floor.

Or, maybe that’s just at my house.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs You’ve Had Too Much Candy HalloweenNot only is this the time of year when we tell our children it’s ok to take candy from strangers, but we actually dress them up like little crazy folks and send them out to beg for candy.

The hypnotic sweet scent of candy surrounds you the moment you step into any store, causing you to mindlessly grab and cling to bags of Kit Kats and mini Snickers, as though you’re lost at sea and they’re life vests.

Is this sugar tsunami threatening to drown you? Have you had too much candy? Is it time to set down the bag of Starbursts and to slowly back away before anyone else gets hurt?

How can you be sure?

If you (or your child or your spouse) meet any of the following qualifications, you (or he or she) have had too much candy:

Top 10 Signs You’ve Had Too Much Candy

#10.  Your commute to work took half its usual time & you didn’t even take your car.

#9.  You know what the fox said.

#8.  You can see sound.

#7.  You stirred your morning coffee with a Snickers bar & followed it with a Milky Way chaser.

#6.  You can recite The Song of Hiawatha 10 times in a row without taking a breath.

#5.  You swam ten laps at the gym & never got wet.

#4.  You sent your daughter’s hamster into a sugar coma just by breathing on it.

#3.  You didn’t pay attention to what was discussed at your morning staff meeting, because you were too busy picking M&M characters to match each person seated around the table.

#2.  You complained to the waiter at lunch that your salad had no colorful candy coating.

#1.  You did that Gangnam Style thing so fast that you set the carpet on fire.

If you still aren’t sure whether you (or your spouse or your child) have had too much candy, down one more Milk Dud, then see if the fluorescent lights in your office get brighter.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

How flows the candy tide at your house?  Are you chocolate or anti-chocolate? Do you monitor the candy intake or just hope it all disappears soon?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Tuesday Tickles – dvovc

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Twitter MomSpeak KidSpeak Tuesday Tickles – dvovcTuesday Tickles – dvovc

Complied by Gina Valley

I love to share giggles.

Here’s some of the tweets

that made me laugh in the last week.

 

Great tweets from great tweeps:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Be sure to follow me on Twitter so you don’t miss a laugh!

 

Don’t miss a giggle.  “Like” up my Facebook page, and share it with a friend.

Laugh Loud Out!

-gina

What makes you smile?  Where do you turn when you need a giggle?  Do you have a favorite tweeter?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Seriously Today – I’m Angry!

Seriously Today – I’m Angry!

by Gina Valley

I’m angry.

Maybe more than angry.

Yes, definitely more than angry.

Yesterday, one of my daughters was the victim of a crime.

Five of my kids and I were out clothes shopping.  My 19 year old son took my youngest kids to wait in our van while I paid for his sister’s clothes, as the line to pay was long and slow. Our van was parked about 20 parking spaces straight out from the front of the store I was in.

My teenage daughter got tired of waiting in line with me, and decided to go wait in our van, too.

Crime Assault Family Life Love Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Harassment Seriously Today – I’m Angry!

It never occurred to me that it was unsafe for her to walk from the store to our van.  I didn’t even think about it. I couldn’t see her trek from my vantage point, but even if I could have, it would not have occurred to me to monitor it. Her older brother, waiting in our van, had no idea she was on her way, but he, too, would never have thought she needed protecting at that point.

Even now, looking back, it seems impossible that something bad could happen when she had such a short distance to cover in broad daylight, in a shopping center located in a Los Angeles suburb, that has been repeatedly named one of the safest places to live in our nation several times.

But, something bad did happen.

A man followed my daughter almost the instant she left the store. He harassed her, made crude, salacious comments, and tried to touch her. It terrified her. She was nearly running by the time she reached our van, with this man inches behind her.

Her brother, then alerted to trouble, hopped out of our van and started toward the man. The man saw him, and ran off.

When I returned to our van, no one mentioned the incident to me until we were nearly out of the shopping center parking lot.

When someone finally did, I immediately parked, so I could get the whole story.

After making sure my daughter was okay, I drove around the shopping center in an effort to locate this man. If my daughter was not safe, no one else’s was either. I could not just drive off and leave a dangerous situation for the next child who was in that shopping center.

We found the man.

I had my kids stay in the van, and I went to talk to the man. I told the man, who was in his thirties, that he had harassed my young, teenage daughter in that parking lot and that was completely unacceptable.  He spewed out some filth and lies, trying to make it sound like my daughter had sought him out. I reminded him that it is a crime for an adult such as himself to make comments like that to a child or to try to touch anyone.  He again replied with filth and non-sense.

It was clear at that point that he was either mentally ill or under chemical influence. I told him I was going to call the police because he was a danger to children in the area. He said that he did not care. I asked him if I could take his picture. He said, “Yeah, then I can be famous.”

I took his picture, in case he disappeared before the police arrived. I called 911, and the first squad car arrived a couple minutes later. When it did, the man raced into a large store, presumably to hide.

Several more squad cars with multiple officers arrived. They searched the store, found the man, and arrested him.

In the movies, that’s where this kind of story ends. The bad guy goes to jail, where he will be kept until he changes his way. The victim goes home, feeling healed & safe, knowing that the bad guy is gone forever.  Even the police officers feel great about having solved a problem and ensured safety in the kingdom.

But, this wasn’t a movie.

This bad guy will not be kept in jail until he changes his way.

The victim does not feel healed or safe.

The officers involved feel only frustration and futility, knowing the problem is not solved.

And, I’m angry about it. All of it.

I’m angry that I have to think about this.  All of it.  I not only have to consider whether a child is mature enough not to get lost and large enough not to be carried off, but also is he or she protected enough not to be harassed if walking around outside. Our children should be safe because they are children. I’m angry that is not the case.

I’m angry that this man has a very long history of being arrested in that area for similar offenses, which have steadily increased in aggressiveness, and  yet the law that works so well to protect the accused’s rights, does nothing to protect the rights of the innocents, in this case, my daughter.

I’m angry that my daughter must change her behavior to protect herself from this man, but this man does not have to change his. One of the officers told me that he had personally arrested this man at least a dozen times and that I needed to make sure my daughter knew that this man would be back in the area as soon as he got out of jail, so that she can brace herself for that.  My daughter will have to stay away from that shopping center for her own safety, but the man who tried to assault her there will return.

I’m angry I hadn’t taught my daughter to scream, make a scene, and yell for help in that kind of situation. I’m angry it hadn’t even occurred to me that she would ever be in that kind of situation, and would need those kinds of skills.

I’m angry that my daughter has had to relive what was a terrifying experience for her, over and over, as she was asked to give her statement to the officers and detectives. They need her statement to do their job. They need it to protect other people. But, I’m still angry that she had to do that, because of the additional pain and trauma it caused her.

I’m angry that I had to take my daughter to the police station to be photographed and recorded. Officers on the case wisely called in a sex crimes prosecutor for advice on what evidence to collect, so as to have the best chance at convicting this man.

They were told to photograph my daughter wearing the outfit she was wearing at the time, and to record her voice making her statement to be able to demonstrate in court at a later date that she clearly appeared to be a minor at the time. They told me that it’s good she has braces, and that it’s good she doesn’t wear makeup.

Basically, what they were preparing for was a future attempt to blame the victim for this crime. Some lawyer is going to stand in front of a judge and try to convince him that this attack was the victim’s fault, my daughter’s fault.  I’m angry about that.

I’m angry that my daughter must go through a very stressful process in order to protect others from becoming victims in this man’s ever more aggressive string of harassments. It could have been much, much worse. Many have had much, much worse happen to them. That’s why we’re putting in the time and effort to pursue prosecution in this case. This man has a history of arrests, and, according to officials, his actions are becoming more aggressive.  I am angry that it’s so hard to protect other people.

I’m angry because apparently this man has a parent in the nearby area, who is in denial about his mental health issues, and has refused to advocate for him to be evaluated to receive clearly needed mental health treatment. This man is headed for tragedy, his own and possibly that of innocent people around him, too, if he does not receive mental health treatment.

Most of all, I’m angry that something was taken from my daughter that she will never get back.

Every time she walks alone in a parking lot for the rest of her life she will have doubts as to her safety.  She will never again have the innocent, carefree attitude as she walks around in public that she had before that afternoon. She won’t be thinking about what she’s doing with her friends on Friday night or the cute boots she saw in the store window or how excited her brother will be when he opens up the birthday gift she bought him.

Instead, in the back of her mind, and sometimes in the front, she’ll wonder if she’s being followed. She’ll plan how she’ll escape.

I’m angry about that.

Very angry.

Fifteen year olds should be worried about who likes whom and acne and what movie is coming out on Friday night.

They shouldn’t have to think about whether someone is going to hurt them.

But now, sadly, that’s what mine has to think about now.

And, I’m angry.

-gina

How do you handle it when something bad happens to one of your loved ones?  Have you helped a family member through a scary time?  Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Tuesday Tickles – dvuvc

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Twitter MomSpeak KidSpeak Tuesday Tickles – dvuvcTuesday Tickles – dvuvc

Complied by Gina Valley

I love to share giggles.

Here’s some of the tweets

that made me laugh in the last week.

 

Great tweets from great tweeps:

Be sure to follow me on Twitter so you don’t miss a laugh!

Don’t miss a giggle.  “Like” up my Facebook page, and share it with a friend.

Laugh Loud Out!

-gina

What makes you smile?  Where do you turn when you need a giggle?  Do you have a favorite tweeter?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Laugh, Cry, Or Stab Somebody With A Fork!

Laugh, Cry, Or Stab Somebody With A Fork!

by Gina Valley

Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Laugh, Cry, Or Stab Someone With A Fork!

If there was even one clean fork in this house I’d have stabbed somebody.

Daughter#1 called during my morning meeting, which frankly wasn’t going that well anyway. Someone had just said that he didn’t understand my fee since I “just have to write down what pops into my head.” He then pointed out that it isn’t like I have to “work hard like a plumber or even an NFL player.”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Laugh, Cry, Or Stab Somebody With A Fork! Stress

My cell phone buzzed with Daughter#1’s call right then, denying me the opportunity to search through my purse for a fork. That’s really too bad, because, as long as the jury had a few writers, artists or even pole dancers on it, I’m sure I’d never have been convicted.

I stepped out of the meeting to take Daugher#1’s call. My kids know to text when I’m scheduled for meetings, because I can always answer those subtly. They’re to call only if there is an urgent problem, like bleeding from an artery or being on fire or having head lice. So, naturally, I was concerned.

I was also a sucker.

Daughter#1, who is in high school, was calling me with a sock emergency, as in she needed some.

Now, you need to realize that when she left for school in the morning, I had mentioned her lack of socks. I’d told her to go back up to her room to get some before her ride left. Nothing stinkier than shoes that have housed naked feet.

But, it wasn’t her feet that were suffering from her lack of sockage. It was her hands. She needed socks to make a sock puppet. In her college preparatory history class. Did I mention she’s in high school?

When I noted that she could just get hers off of her feet, she mentioned, in fine teenage form, that she hadn’t exactly taken my sock advice that morning and wasn’t wearing any.

I texted a picture of a fork to her.

I bought a new, fluffy bed for our girl puppy, as her brother had spilled a gallon of milk on her old one. Even twice through the washing machine hadn’t gotten rid of the smell, so it had taken a trip to the rubbish can.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Laugh, Cry, Or Stab Somebody With A Fork! Stress

Our 70LB delicate feminine flower seemed thrilled with her soft, new sleeping place. She jumped on it, bit it several times, and then did her tradition pre-snooze 3 spins.

But, she didn’t lie down to snooze after the last spin. I thought she’d decided to sit down instead, but I was wrong. She wasn’t squatting to sit. She was, unbelievably since she’s been house trained for months, squatting to piddle.

Big canine that she is, her output was tremendous. The flood she produced quickly filled every nook and cranny of the fluffy, tufted bed.  Seeing the rising tide, I let out a yell. This startled the pup, and she and her piddle-soaked feet took off galloping through our house, leaving a trail of shiny, wet paw prints.

While I attempted to delicately wrangle the drenched bed out of my house, our boy puppy crashed into me, jolting the bed and causing much of its liquid cargo to splatter onto the floor. And my feet.

If I’d had a fork, I’d have used it.

Homework time was a joy to behold. My 12 year old, for example, morphed into a screaming, fit-throwing two year old, and took 37 minutes and 2 temper tantrums to write 1 spelling word definition. I handled the situation with extreme parental grace by turning into a screaming, fit-throwing two year old myself. Of course, my tirade was a bit more impressive than his. I have broader vocabulary.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Laugh, Cry, Or Stab Somebody With A Fork! Stress

I knew better than to allow myself to think about a fork at that point.

With our pack finally all in their beds for the night, I decided to tell The Professor the tale of my day’s woes. He is, after all, required to be sympathetic, at least until death parts us. He listened intently as I began.

I was not even half a sentence into the stabby story of my day when, not only did that man nod off, he flippin’ let out a snore that woke the dog.

But, I didn’t yearn for a fork.

I went and got a bowl of warm water.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

How’s your week going?   Are you laughing?  Any fork-worthy events?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Top 10 Reasons I’m Rolling My Eyes

Top 10 Reasons I’m Rolling My Eyes

by Gina Valley

I really hate it when my kids roll their eyes at something.

Especially when that something is me.

So, I make it a point to try not to do many eye rolls myself. Trying to set at least an ok example, and all that.

But, this week, I’ve been rolling my eyes so much I think it counts as cardio.

Why the sudden shifting of my oculars? I’m glad you asked.

Top 10 Reasons I’m Rolling My Eyes

#10.  Because when I walked up to the paint mixing counter with both teal and coral colored paint smudges on my hands and shirt, the Home Depot paint clerk told me, “If you want any color other than white we have to mix it.”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Reasons I'm Rolling My Eyes Duh Moments

#9.  Because my eldest son said to me, while I was dragging his giant puppy off of our dining room table, again, “My friend’s turtle had 48 babies. They live 80-100 years, and get up to 150 lbs!  Can we get 2?”

#8.  Because when Son#2 handed me my car key it was bent to a 90 degree angle, and he said, “It was that way when I got it.”

#7. Because, after my pack had all left for school, I found a pair of someone’s underwear in my dining room. Again.

#6.  Because, after Son#4 told me, “I’m done cleaning the yard,” and I asked him, “Did you pick up the trash & sweep the patio?” he said, “No.”

#5.  Because clearly the difficulty in attempting to copy a missing key escaped my eldest daughter when she lost my house key, and said, “Can’t you just make another copy?”

#4.  Because Son#3, who has severe asthma triggered by exercise and plant allergies, announced, as he got out of our van and took off running across the field to soccer practice, that he decided not to take his allergy pill before soccer practice because he just didn’t feel like taking it.

#3.  Because when I told my Daughter#3 I was late picking her up because I fell asleep while I was working on a column, she said, “Wow, it must be really funny.”

#2.  Because when I told Son#2 I needed him to give Daughter#2 a ride to school because she overslept, he said, “Could you please ask me the night before next time?”

#1.  Because I tried to turn the TV channel with my cell phone. Again.

I wonder how many calories a good eye roll burns. After all, I’ve got a high school reunion coming up soonto get in shape for.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Any ridiculousness in your life lately?  Are your eyes a’ rollin’? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photo courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

ALMOST Learning

ALMOST Learning

by Gina Valley

I’m off this week to attend to issues my children are having.

To keep you in giggles, read and laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Laughs From The Land Of Almost Learning

Between too much work and too many cranky people, I’ve had a rough week.

Really rough.  Like “descend into my dungeon of self-pity, close the black curtains, and sit on the floor in the dirt” rough.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley ALMOST LearningI’m ready for a vacation.

School & homework time with my pack have not been particularly glowing sources of joy this week, but they did have their moments.   I’ve got some of the educationally-sourced laughs packed up and ready to go right here.

Milton Berle said, “Laughter is an instant vacation.”

Join me, won’t you?

(I’ll wait while you grab your favorite drink and put your feet up.  Your tray table does not need to be stowed and your seat does not need to be in a fully upright position.)

File this under:  Because English Doesn’t Always Make Sense

My 10 year-old hollered from the next room, “Mom, how do you spell ‘neighbor’?”

I said, “N-E-I-G-H-B-O-R.”

After a pause, he hollered again, “How do you spell it?”

I repeated, “N-E-I, G-H, B-O-R.”

He asked again, “How do you spell neighbor?”

I again repeated, “N-E-I, G-H, B-O-R.”

He asked, “Are you sure?”

I said, “Yes.  N-E-I, G-H, B-O-R.”

After another long pause and a clearly audible sigh, he said, “Mom, I think you’re spelling the wrong word.”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley ALMOST LearningFile this under:  Focus, Focus, Focus

I’m not entirely sure that my 4th grader was well focused on writing his five paragraph essay (why must it be a five paragraph essay?  When did the five paragraph essay become the holy grail of language arts?),  because he asked me, “What’s that paper with all of the little squares on both sides called?”

I reminded him that it’s called “graph paper.”

Then, he said, “Yeah, graph paper.  Well, graph paper has 1386 little squares on each side.”

I’m not sure how that relates to the essay he is writing about extreme weather events.  Maybe it’s part of the new math.

File this under:  Ooops – there goes another brain cell

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley ALMOST Learning

I don’t know if the world is a safer place or his education has truly been furthered, but my 11 year-old finished memorizing the poem about a squeaky squid and a walrus that he was sure he could not memorize.  In fact, we went through it so many times, most of my pack members now have the poem permanently committed to memory, whether they wanted to or not.

We also discovered that if you repeat the line “The squawking woke the walrus” a bunch of times, you lose the ability to pronounce “walrus” correctly, and slip into fits of uncontrolled, joyful hysteria (try saying it 10 times fast without laughing.  Can’t be done!).

One small step for memorization and public speaking.

One giant step for giggling and laughter.

File this under:  Kids know just how to boost your self-esteem

My youngest came home from school, and told me, quite excitedly, that he made me a killer whale on his family totem pole.  I asked why he chose a killer whale for me.  He said, “Because you are playful, and you’re fierce, and you’re really good at catching fish.”

Hmmm.  A killer whale?  I’d like to see what else was on that list to choose from.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley ALMOST LearningFile this under:  It’s an X-chromosome thing

I teach art occasionally at the local elementary school my kids attend.  I love to do it.

When I finished teaching art to the class my 10 year-old is in this week, the lead teacher said to the class, “What do we say to Ms. Valley?”

In unison the kids said, “Thank you, Ms. Valley.”

Except for one little girl in the back.

She hollered out loudly, “I love your shoes!”

There’s a kid after my own heart!

Laugh Out Loud!
-gina

What made you giggle this week?  I’m looking forward to hearing about it! Please shoot me a comment with all the details.  Hurry before someone needs you to spell a big word!

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Tuesday Tickles – ndvtgf

Tuesday Tickles – ndvtgf

Complied/written by Gina Valley

I’m off this week to attend to issues my children are having.

To keep you in giggles, read and laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Twitter MomSpeak KidSpeak Tuesday Tickles – ndvtgfTuesday Tickles – ndvt

I love to share giggles.

Here’s some of the tweets that

made me laugh in the last week.

 

 

 Great tweets from great tweeps:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Be sure to follow me on Twitter so you don’t miss a laugh!

 

Momspeak

(stuff I can hardly believe I said out loud to my pack this week):

A flip flop is not a plate.

Why did you put cheese in your hair?

Yes, you must wear both shoes.  All day.

 

Kidspeak

(stuff I can hardly believe one of my pack said to me this week):

My earlobe is relaxed.

Are we having food for dinner?

I stepped in dog poo.  Lucky I was wearing your shoes.

 

Laugh Loud Out!

-gina

What makes you smile?  Where do you turn when you need a giggle?  Do you have a favorite tweeter?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Don’t miss a giggle.  Be sure to “Like” up my Facebook page, and to share it with a friend.

Top 10 Surprising Things In My Closet

Top 10 Surprising Things In My Closet

by Gina Valley

I’m off this week to attend to issues my children are having.

To keep you in giggles, read and laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Surprising Things I Found While Cleaning Out My Closet

I cleaned out my closet last weekend.

It was frightening.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Surprising Things In My Closet Organizing Disorganization

I found myself muttering the phrase, “What was I thinking?  What was I thinking?” over and over to myself as I removed each garment from the rod.  “This must have been on sale,” seemed to blurt out frequently, as I opened dusty shoe boxes containing shoes I was shocked had made it home with me.

I’ve just now reached the point where I can think and write about the experience without the memory of elastic pants and plastic pumps found deep within its confines making me cringe.

Much as I’d like to forget about many of the things I discovered in my closet, some of the stuff I found was truly noteworthy.

Top 10 Surprising Things I Found While Cleaning Out My Closet

#10.  My 8th grade graduations dress (No, it doesn’t fit.  Not even close.  Yes, it inspired me to go to the gym this morning).

#9.  Bright blue taffeta bridesmaid dress (clearly saved because of its great re-wearing potential).

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Surprising Things In My Closet Organizing Disorganization#8.  A bag of Easter candy with a receipt dated 2007 (I won’t tell you who saw me toss that in the trash, and said, “Don’t just throw that away.  It might still be good.  Let me try some,” but there’s a very good chance I’m married to him.  And, no, I didn’t let him eat it.  Like I need another trip to the emergency room this week).

#7.  THREE suede 4” heeled boots  (Three?  No wonder that box was so big).

#6.  Box of Christmas cards (stamped, sealed, addressed, and ready to go from 7 years ago.  Oops).

#5.  Black and white pumps I wore the first day of my first engineering job. (yes, they’re still awesome.  And, weirdly, they’re too big.  Did my feet shrink? How can I make other body parts do that?)

#4.  DVD’s of Seasons 1 & 2 of Justified (purchased to give to Son#1 on his birthday.  2 years ago.  Oops).

#3.  The puke green raincoat I received as a gift 6 years ago, that I’m sure I donated to the charity clothes drive 5 ½ years ago (how did it get back here?  I’m a little afraid to try to give it away again).

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Surprising Things In My Closet Organizing Disorganization#2.  A purse full of mold (my favorite red leather purse had become the final resting place for some sort of volatile food item, and, in turn, the birth place of a whole colony of mold.  On a related note:  I need a new red purse).

#1.  The cane the nurse insisted I take home with me when I checked out of the hospital following a procedure to restore my badly dislocated shoulder (she’d said, “All joint surgery patients must be issued a cane when discharged.”  When I pointed out that it was my shoulder joint they’d worked on, and that I didn’t see how the cane would help me, she’d said, “I’m sure you’ll work something out”).

If I were to put all of that together, it’d make one heck of an outfit.

Maybe I could be on Project Runway.

Or, an episode of What Not To Wear.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Anything interesting lurking in your closet?  How long is it safe to keep candy?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Friday Funnies – nvnvc

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvcFriday Funnies – nvnvc

It’s Friday.

End of the week. Start of the weekend.

Pull up a chair & grab your favorite frosty beverage.

Time to get your giggle on.

 

Friday Funnies –

Smiles From Around The World Wide Web

Complied by Gina Valley

Visit the Gina Valley Facebook page and to “like” it up.

Consider this your formal invitation to check out all of my boards on Pinterest.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

 …probably more than 3!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

No job is finished until the paperwork is finished…

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

Mine, too!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

That’s some serious overtraining right there!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

DEFINITELY not human!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

That’s why I love corners! I’m always cold!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

I’d want to see what happens…for science, of course.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

Someone should keep an eye on him. We’re always trying to find him.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

Brilliant! I wish I’d seen this years ago!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

We’ve been decorated for months!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

It’s all about communication.

 

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Negotiations are likely to break down.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

Where’s his cape?

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Facebook Pinterest Friday Funnies - nvnvc

My youngest tells this joke every week during pasta night.

Have you fanned me up on Facebook? If not, here’s your chance!  Click on over and hit “like” so you don’t miss a giggle (be sure to hover and select “Show in News Feed” while you’re at it, so Facebook will show you the giggles).

My pins for the week are here on my Latest Great Pins Board.

 

This Week On The Gina Valley Blog:

My We Remember post is a remembrance of the 9/11 tragedy.

My recent humor posts include

Back To School Funnies (education humor),

Pumpkin Should Be A 4 Letter Word…Gina’s Favorites (we’re being invaded),

Top 10 REAL Names For This Waiting Room (there’s so much more than waiting going on),

Tuesday Tickles – ndsvc (a week’s worth of tickles),

Top 5 IDIOTIC Things I Do When I Forget My Phone (I’ve lost my phone AND my mind),

NO ONE Will Do THIS For Their Family (we’ll block a bullet, but we won’t do this),

Youth Soccer Is The Root Of All Evil…Gina’s Favorites (it’s not just a sport).

I hope they gave you some giggles, too.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina             

What made you smile this week? Did you have a good week?  Any big plans this weekend?  Have you scheduled time to relax?  I’m looking forward to hearing about it!  Shoot me a comment with all the details!