Join Gina Valley Wed 3-23-16 for Humor In Parenting

Join Me Wed 3/23 for Humor In Parenting

One of the most important keys to parenting is humor. Sometimes you have to laugh to keep from crying.

Let’s Chat! I’ll be discussing Humor & Parenting on Wednesday, March 23, at 9pm EST with the great folks at  #30SecondMom Chat. Everyone is invited to join in. I hope you’ll be there.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Join Me Wed 3-23-16 for Humor In ParentingWhether you are in the thick of parenting, are grand-parenting, or are still considering becoming a parent, there will be fun and knowledge for you. Plus, we look forward to hearing about your parenting and growing up experiences, both the funny and the cringe worthy.

You can join in the chat by searching #30SecondMom on Twitter. There are many useful platforms to use during a Twitter chat, too, including Tweetchat (I use Tweetchat), Tweetdeck, and Hootsuite, plus several others.

I will be chatting with my Twitter handle @GinaValley and also my back up Twitter handle @GinaValley2 (in case I am thrown into Twitter jail on my primary account for tweeting too much!). Be sure to follow both so you can easily see the Tweets.

I will respond to everyone I can during the chat. If I miss a comment or question during the chat, I will answer it after the chat. Sometimes chats get so crazy it is hard to keep up, and I have to review and answer afterward.

If you’d like to qualify to win prizes you can RSVP here.

Be sure to attach the #30SecondMom hashtag to each of your tweets during the chat so we can all see what you have to say.

#30SecondMom Chat is the best moms’ night in on Twitter.

I look forward to hanging out with you and hearing what you have to say.

See you there!

-gina

I Left My Brain At The Car Rental Counter!!! …Gina’s Favorites

I Left My Brain At The Car Rental Counter!!! …Gina’s Favorites

By Gina Valley

I’m traveling this week & this timely topic came to mind. Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

I Left My Brain At The Car Rental Counter!!!

I rent cars frequently, so you’d think I’d be good at figuring out how to use the gadgets in an unfamiliar vehicle. But, you’d be wrong.

Generally, I muddle through as I meet each new set of wheels. Occasionally, I’m briefly baffled, but usually I figure most everything out.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley I Left My Brain At The Car Rental Counter!!! ...Gina's Favorites ConfusionThis time, though, I was nearly inept.

Maybe it was because I’ve never rented this brand (I think the proper term is “make” of car, but we use the word “make” to tell our puppies it’s time for them to poop, so I have trouble using “make” to describe a car without giggling. I’m giggling now) of car before.

Maybe it was because I didn’t get the usual 30 second run down on the car’s quirks from the rental car agent.

Maybe it was because I only slept 3 hours the night before.

But, whatever it was, clearly, my brain was slipping a gear. Maybe two.

I could not turn off the blinker.

I pushed the turn signal bar down to signal a left side lane change, and then pushed it back up to turn it off. But, that did not turn it off. It, instead, turned on the right side turn indicator. I assumed I had pushed it up too far, so I pushed it down a tad. This, of course, turned the left side signal back on.

I repeated this futile exercise 6 or 8 times, convincing the drivers around me that I had completely lost my mind or was harboring battling personalities, before I accidentally pushed the bar forward, turning off the signal the way many cars activate their high beams.

Then, I panicked, worrying about a possible high beam emergency ensuing any second, because I realized I had no idea how to turn on the high beams. I never did figure out how to activate the high beams. Fortunately, there were no high beam-necessitating emergencies.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley I Left My Brain At The Car Rental Counter!!! ...Gina's Favorites ConfusionI was blasting the radio, which I love to do when driving alone. But, when I needed to turn down the volume, I kept reaching for the knob in the place it is in most cars. Turns out that is the fan speed controller in that car, and it didn’t work well at all to turn down the radio volume.

I repeated this feat of brilliance at least a dozen times during the drive. Each time I was surprised the volume was unchanged, and each time I was then immediately thankful my thoughts were not broadcast over the internet for all to share in my stupidity. Especially for that 12th time.

Not only was I volume-control-impaired, I was also sound-direction-impaired. All of the radio sound was coming from the right side speakers. I couldn’t figure out how to change that, even after I parked the car and closely examined the controls.

My right ear was the only one processing the sound, and that made it feel like my left ear had gone deaf. I briefly wondered if I could somehow manage to drive while seated backwards so as to give my left ear a chance at some action, but decided against it when I realized I still needed to figure out how to turn on the windshield wipers.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley I Left My Brain At The Car Rental Counter!!! ...Gina's Favorites ConfusionJust getting out of the car I somehow activated the hazard lights.

And, search as I did, I could not find a button to push inside of the car to pop open the trunk. Thankfully, there was an icon on the key fob that popped that puppy open after only 25 different tries. I was glad I didn’t have to try to explain to everyone at the meeting that my notes were locked in a car with an unopenable trunk & vertigo-inducing speakers.

By the time I walked into the conference room, I felt like I was rapidly morphing into an idiot (I might or might not have gotten off on the wrong floor on the way up. Seven and five are very similar, you know).

Then, as I waited for the meeting to begin, I remembered I never turned off the car’s hazard lights, and realized my transformation was complete.

I had, obviously, left my brain at the rental car counter.

Or, maybe I locked it in the trunk.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Do you ever feel like your IQ has fallen out your ear?  Do you adapt quickly to driving an unfamiliar vehicle, or do you find yourself unable to unlock the doors?  I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say. Luckily, there’s a handy “comment” button right on this page!

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

There’s NO Sleep In Sleep-Over

There’s NO Sleep In Sleep-Over

by Gina Valley

I didn’t realize a person could wear a dress shirt inside out.

But, The Professor did it today.

I think he gained that super power sometime around 3:31am when the fifth loud crash, followed by peals of laughter, echoed up from our family room. He rolled over and asked me if I thought it was too late to return our children to the hospital.

I giggled at my sleep-deprived husband. We could never return our children. I have no idea where the receipts are.

Our 14 year old and 5 of his friends camped out in our family room last night. Our son said it was a sleepover. I’m not sure what it was, but it was definitely not a sleepover.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley There’s NO Sleep In Sleep-Over

No one slept. No one.

No one downstairs slept.

No one upstairs slept.

I don’t even think anyone in the yard slept, because I’m pretty sure the raccoon that lives in the tree in our backyard flipped me off while I was taking out the trash after breakfast.

I tried to sleep, but each time my total exhaustion overcame the noise and I started to doze off, my daughters burst into our bedroom and demanded that I “Tell the boys to ‘Shut up!’”

I did not “tell the boys to ‘Shut up!’” although I might have, if I hadn’t been too exhausted to get out of bed.

So, my eyes are bloodshot, and I accidentally brushed my teeth with wrinkle cream this morning.

My daughters are frighteningly grumpy, and thankfully, refusing to get out of their beds.

The 14 year olds encamped in our family room only opened their eyes long enough this morning to find the Capt’n Crunch and M&M’s they’d requested for breakfast (I know. I was grossed out, too). Then, they all collapsed back onto the floor, snoring with their pillows and video game controllers.

Even our dogs have bags under their eyes, and are too sleepy to wag their tails.

And, I think I saw our XBox yawn.

I could tell The Professor was too sleep-deprived to think, because he patted me on the head and kissed our dog goodbye on his way out the door. He was off to deliver a lecture on snail teeth, or some such vital topic. I wondered how he’d remember what he was supposed to say.

I also wondered about his unusual fashion choice.

“Hey,” I queried. “What’s up with your shirt?”

“I had a lot trouble buttoning it,” he answered, after draining his coffee mug.

I refilled it for him. “I think that’s ‘cause…uh…it’s inside-out,” I answered.

I decided not to mention he was wearing two different shoes.

After all, who was I to criticize? I’d just gargled with my contact lens solution.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Do your kids sleep at sleep-overs? Did you, when you were a child? Do my shoes match? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing what you think.

Photos courtesy of Dreamstime.com – Used with permission.

Top 10 Reasons Daylight Savings Time Is The Devil …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Reasons Daylight Savings Time Is The Devil …Gina’s Favorites

By Gina Valley

Laugh along with this timely Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Reasons Daylight Savings Time Is The Devil

There are few things that draw people together like the near universal hatred of the “Spring forward!” part of Daylight Savings Time.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Reasons Daylight Savings Time Is The Devil ...Gina's Favorites

I’m told that when Daylight Savings Time was first instituted oh so many decades ago that there were many benefits to the average person.

Be that as it may, I’m not seeing the benefits at this point, and I think we need to band together to get rid of the whole thing (and that one super nasty, taste-of-death candy they hide amongst all the good ones in every box of Sees’ candy. What flavor is that supposed to be anyway? Rotting dirt?).

Besides not seeing the benefits, I’m seeing lots of problems. It’s bad enough trying to figure out what time it is here, trying to figure out what time it is in other parts of the world to time communication correctly is really tough.  And, getting my kids up in time for school is near impossible. Truly, Daylight Savings Time is the devil.

Top 10 Reasons Daylight Savings Time Is The Devil

#10.  It forces us to grudgingly use our interpersonal skills, as we, as a group, wander around the week before we change the clocks asking each other, “Is it ‘Spring forward’? It’s ‘Spring forward,’ right? Are you sure it’s not ‘Spring back?’”

#9.  Even as we are in the midst of the sleep deprivation it has wrought, we must exhibit extra coordination as we attempt to adjust our car dashboard clock, while at the same time trying to avoid oncoming cars careening in our direction, piloted by others who are both sleep deprived and trying to figure out how to change their dashboard clocks.

#8.  We run the risk of a cardiac event when we’re staring at our phone at 1:59am and it suddenly switches to 3am, causing us to panic, as we wonder whether we have just time experienced time travel or a black out.

#7.  It brings out extra personality in our children on Monday morning, and causes shoes, backpacks, and homework to disappear at near-double the normal rate.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Reasons Daylight Savings Time Is The Devil ...Gina's Favorites

#6.  It turns adults into children, as we attempt to grasp any reason, no matter how flimsy, as to why we must remain in bed for another hour, and probably for the rest of the week.

#5.  It causes the phrase “I’m not tired!” to be uttered angrily, forcefully, and a near-world-record-setting number of times for the entire week after we “Spring forward!”

#4.  None of us “Spring forward!” We all barely stumble forward, and the whole “Spring forward!” and its cheerful tone is just mocking us.

#3.  It makes everyone arrive 30 minutes early for the second service at church on Sunday morning, when we were in fact all shooting for the first service, but forgot to adjust our clocks.

#2.  It turns our co-workers into seeming philosophers or heroin addicts, as they wander from cubicle to cubicle, muttering “What time is it? Does anyone know what time it is?”

#1.  It’s just another way to torture parents of small children, because small children neither know nor care what Daylight Savings Time is, and see no reason to go to bed an hour before they did last week, yet somehow manage to get up an hour earlier each morning.

It’s time to stop the madness!

At least I think it is.

Does anyone know what time it is?

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Do you love or hate Daylight Savings Time? Do they follow Daylight Savings Time where you live?  Why do they put that one nasty candy in with the good candy? Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Where Did My Cool Go? …Gina’s Favorites

Where Did My Cool Go? …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

I’ve spelled my own name wrong three times already this morning. So, it seems fitting that my Where Did My Cool Go? post make an appearance for Throwback Day this week. Heaven knows my cool is nowhere to be found!
Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Where Did My Cool Go?

I’m not cool.

I realized that today.

I suppose, on some level, I’ve known it for a while, but today it became glaringly clear. Because today, I realized I have become my father.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Where Did My Cool Go? ...Gina's Favorites

Don’t get me wrong. There’re a lot of cool things about my father. My dad is a great guy. He’s funny and smart and giving.  I’d love to turn into that part of my dad. But, I didn’t.

….

I’d just finished installing a new kitchen faucet.

We’d had to get a new kitchen faucet, because the old one had fallen apart. You had to use a pair of locking pliers just to turn the thing on, water temperature was a gamble, and it vibrated so much when the water flowed that dirty dishes kept bouncing off the counter.

So, we’d headed to our friendly, neighborhood, giant home improvement store (I’ve always thought running water in the kitchen improved any home) to get a new kitchen faucet set.

Some of the faucets were so expensive I wondered if they magically cleaned dishes all by themselves. The Professor took one look at the wall of water wonders, and announced he refused to pay more for this faucet than he did for his first car.

We picked the one that was in our budget, and looked like it could handle having our kids tie the dog to it without breaking off. The fact that it supposedly had an anti-fingerprint finish just made us giggle. I was sure our kids would accept that challenge. They’re very competitive. No faucet was going beat them.

….

So, there I stood in our kitchen, putting away my tools and looking at our newly installed faucet, when I heard someone say, “That’s a beautiful faucet.”

I looked around, and realized I was the only one there. And, not only had I said, “That’s a beautiful faucet,” I really thought that faucet was beautiful.

I flashed back to holding the tools while my dad installed a new kitchen faucet in my childhood home when I was a teenager. I remembered him saying, while he polished it with a cloth, “That’s a beautiful faucet.” I remembered thinking how that was further proof my dad was totally uncool.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Where Did My Cool Go? ...Gina's FavoritesAnd, here I was, decades later, riding the same train of uncoolness. Today’s stop was “Admiring household plumbing fixtures.” I could only wonder whether tomorrow’s stop would be listening to Muzak, wearing sensible shoes, or buying high-waisted, polyester pants (as I typed that I thought, “at least those things don’t ever wrinkle,” and felt myself drift ever further away from cool).

When did this happen? When did I lose my cool?

I related my tale of uncoolness-woe to my friend, Vernice. I told her that I felt disheartened and aged beyond my years, because I found new kitchen plumbing fixtures exciting. I wondered aloud if it was because I have children. Had they taken my cool as well as my last functioning brain cell? Vernice nodded along, sympathetically.

“Well, you know…,” my wise friend began.

I can always count on Vernice, and her sage advice to keep me on course. I knew she’d know just what to say to help me get my cool back.

“…that really is a beautiful faucet.”

Apparently, Vernice has turned into my father, too.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Do you feel less than cool? Have you surprised yourself lately? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Stuck In the Car All Day

Stuck In the Car All Day

by Gina Valley

I’m hanging out with the fun folks over at Voiceboks today, laughing about what transpires when we’re stuck in the car all day with our family on a road trip. I hope you’ll click on over and join me there.

Here’s snippet of the giggles you’ll find there:

Great Things About Being Stuck In The Car All Day

School starts soon in our neck of the woods. I thought it’d be fun to squeeze in a quick, end of summer road trip to see the actual woods before school slips fully into gear. So, we, my pack and I, will be spending a couple days in the car.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Stuck In the Car All Day Road TripSome people complain about being stuck in the car all day. In fact, many of the people in our car complain about being stuck in the car all day. And, I’m not just talking about the kids.

But, I consider myself to be a positive person most of the time, or at least when I’ve had enough sleep, or have mysteriously lost a pound, despite eating more chocolate the night before than I’m willing to admit to. And, positive person that I am, I can see many great things about being stuck in the car all day.

First of all, there’s no need to nag children to do their chores. They have no chores. They’re stuck in the car. It’s wonderful to have a break from that source of stress. Now granted, there are still a few things that need to be done, even when we’re in transit all day. But, the closest thing we have to doing dishes and vacuuming is throwing out Happy Meal bags, and brushing crumbs off of the seat and out the door.

Plus, when you’re in the car all day you get to play everyone’s favorite travel game Guess Which Side The Next Nose-Picker Will Drive By On. This simple game is great fun for all ages, from toddler to grandparent, and everyone in between. It does require some concentration, as nosepickers tend to race by at top speed (Why are nose pickers always in such a hurry? Is there some sort of Nose Pickers Anonymous meeting they’re all late for? I hope they don’t greet each other with a handshake).

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Stuck In the Car All Day Road TripWhen you spend all day in the car, no matter where you go, eventually you’ll see some cows. I think the highway department sticks a herd out next to the highway every hundred miles or so to help keep things interesting. But, the great thing about cows is, if you do it just right, when you moo at them, they’ll moo back at you.

I learned that as a kid. We took lots of road trips. My dad would moo at the cows every time we saw some. Every time he did it, the cows would moo back at him, and my mom would say, “Stop that, Gino! You don’t even know what you’re saying to them.” From the way he’d smile, I think maybe he did know.

Spending the day stuck in the car is also a great way to ensure your children will behave well…a few years down the road. At some point during any all-day driving experience, every child falls asleep. If you make a point to snap tons of great Look How Funny You Looked Sleeping Sitting Up pictures, you’ll find them to be very useful for blackmailing your children when they become teenagers…

Click on over to Voiceboks to see all of my Great Things About Being Stuck In the Car All Day post.

And, remember, as always, the extra click to counts as cardio.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What “games” does your family play while stuck in the car? Do you have a favorite road trip memory? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

It’s Different When You’re Married!!! …Gina’s Favorites

It’s Different When You’re Married!!! …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

The Professor and I celebrated our wedding anniversary this week. We were in different states on the actual day, as we often are due to our travel schedules. Being apart on important occasions was a big deal before we were married. But, neither one of us considers it a problem now. We just celebrate when we’re again in the same time zone.
That being the case, I thought it fitting to have my Marriage Changes Us post be our source for Throwback Day giggles this week.
Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Marriage Changes Us

A friend mentioned to me that his wife had finally agreed to let him set up a video camera in their bedroom. I was a little surprised he was sharing that until he explained the reason for the video camera was to determine once and for all who’s snoring and stealing the covers.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley  It's Different When You're Married ...Gina's Favorites Marriage

That made me literally laugh out loud. I couldn’t help it.

I told him how surprised I was that his wife was willing to let him set up a video camera in their bedroom and that was what he wanted to do with it.

That conversation didn’t just make me laugh.  It made me think about how marriage changes us.  I’m not saying that’s bad.  Not saying it’s good.   Just saying it’s different.

It’s really different.

And, it’s funny.

Pre VS Post

Video cameras in the bedroom

  • Pre – night to see who’s the most adventurous
  • Post – night to see who is snoring and hogging the covers

She says “I’m hot!’

  • Pre – he tears off his clothes and jumps into bed
  • Post – he jumps out of bed and turns on the fan

Friday night

  • Pre – standing date – dinner at a hip new restaurant and then seeing the latest hot movie
  • Post -standing date – samples at Costco for dinner and then seeing if you can get the hot roast chicken home without it leaking all over the car

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley  It's Different When You're Married ...Gina's Favorites MarriageNail polish

  • Pre – trying to impress him before each date with perfectly polished toe and fingernails
  • Post – pressing him into painting her toenails for her so she’ll look nice for her night out with the girls.

His Gut

  • Pre – sucking it in every time she so much as glances his way for the duration of the date
  • Post – asking her to watch as he tries to push it out far enough to use it to operate the TV remote control

Dinner

  • Pre – she cooks her special spaghetti and meatballs dinner for him
  • Post – she over-cooks water until it burns, then calls to ask him to pick-up pizza on the way home.

Children

  • Pre – dreaming about the exquisite, perfect geniuses your progeny would be
  • Post – never dreaming because your progeny never let you sleep

Sub-wardrobing

  • Pre – Her skivvies are beautiful and matching
  • Post – if her skivvies are both clean she calls that a match

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley  It's Different When You're Married ...Gina's Favorites Marriage

Underneath it all

  • Pre – he slips into silk boxers he bought because they’re her favorite color
  • Post – he slips into a pair of his Walmart cheapos that he found on the bedroom floor

Movies

  • Pre – He asks her what her favorite part of their shared favorite movie is
  • Post – He asks her if he has seen the movie they’re currently watching, and, when she says that he has, he asks her if he liked it.

Shaving

  • Pre – everywhere everyday just in case
  • Post – only the basics without a two day advanced warning.

Candles

  • Pre – candles burning in the bedroom to set the mood for romance
  • Post – candles burning in the kitchen to cover up the stench created when someone didn’t take their turn at doing the dishes.

Which reminds me – it’s my turn today for dishes.

I wonder if we have any candles.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What changed when you walked down the aisle?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Top 10 Lies Depression Tells …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Lies Depression Tells …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

I’m traveling this week, and have met several people who’s lives have been deeply impacted by depression. In getting to know them, and spending time with family members who also suffer from depression, I realized it’s time to review the important truths discussed in the Top 10 Lies Depression Tells.

Top 10 Lies Depression Tells

Depression runs deep in my life. Many of the people dearest to me suffer with depression. It’s climbed through much of my family tree. It’s sunk its claws into many of my friends. It has taken the lives of many people who were dear to me.

Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Lies Depression Tells ...Gina's FavoritesWhen I drive by a particular freeway interchange I think of someone I love who told me that, while in the depths of depression, it was the spot he’d picked out to end his life. There’s a bridge I pass every week from which a neighbor ended her life.  And, I’ll never forget the wails of grief I heard after informing the parents of a friend, who’d been in our wedding party, that he’d taken his own life.

Depression is many things. It’s a serious mental illness, and needs to be treated as such. It’s a chameleon, which appears in different forms and at different levels in different people. It has many different causes and, sometimes, no known cause at all.

Most of all, depression is a liar.

A big, fat liar.

Listen for these lies if you or someone you know suffers from depression:

Top 10 Lies Depression Tells

Lie #1:  This feeling will never change. – Truth #1:  Yes, it will. This feeling will change. You will not feel like this forever. Everything changes. Things always change. Hold on. Don’t give up.

Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Lies Depression Tells ...Gina's FavoritesLie #2:  Everyone would be better off without me. – Truth #2:  No one’s life is going to get better because you kill yourself. Quite the opposite will happen.  Family members, particularly your children, siblings, and parents, are much more likely to suffer from depression and to kill themselves, if you kill yourself. Close friends are similarly impacted.  One of the primary reasons for this is the despair experienced when someone we are close to takes his or her own life.  Hang on for them, if hanging on for your self is not enough. Don’t give up.

Lie #3:  No one will miss me. – Truth #3:  The aftermath of a suicide is horrendous. There is no funeral sadder than that of a suicide victim. I’ve been to many of them. At every one, the same phrase is heard over and over: if only he/she knew how many people cared about him/her. You have no idea how important you are to some people. Don’t leave them missing you. Don’t give up.

Lie #4:  I don’t matter. – Truth #4:  Yes you do. You do matter. You are valuable simply because you exist. You have amazing potential. Every day, every breath is a miracle, a chance to reach out and up and to do something no one but you is in the position to do. Don’t give up

Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Lies Depression Tells ...Gina's FavoritesLie #5:  It’s my fault I feel this way. – Truth #5:  Depression is an illness, just as the flu and cancer are illnesses. It’s not your fault you have depression, just as it’s not your fault if you get the flu or cancer. Just as you would seek treatment for any illness, seek treatment for your depression. Don’t give up.

Lie #6:  No one cares. – Truth #6:  Many people care. But, people have to know you’re suffering before they can express that caring. Talk to the people in your life. Be honest. Be direct. Don’t expect them to know what you mean or what you are feeling. Tell them plainly. Ask for the help you need. Keep talking to people until you find someone who you feel cares and wants to help you. Don’t give up.

Lie #7:  Nothing can help me. – Truth #7:  Research into depression is vast and ongoing. Treatment options are huge and varied. If one thing doesn’t work, try something else, or a combination of things. Effective treatment is available. Psychiatrists, psychologists, peer-counselors, support groups, medication, eating plans, exercise plans are some of the many possibilities to consider. There is effective help available for you. Keep looking. Don’t give up.

Lie #8:  No one will listen to me. – Truth #8:  Yes, they will. Keep talking. Someone will listen. Keep looking for that someone. Friend, neighbor, pastor, doctor, nurse, teacher, counselor, social worker, police officer, parent, coach, etc. Don’t give up.

Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Lies Depression Tells ...Gina's Favorites Lie #9:  They’ll lock me up if I try to get some help. – Truth #9:  If you seek help, they will help you. No one is going to lock you up for seeking help. If you are a danger to yourself, more intensive help might be called for. Don’t fear that.  You are suffering from an illness. Get the treatment you need to feel better. Don’t give up.

Lie#10:  If I just thought more happy thoughts, this would go away. – Truth #10: Happy thoughts don’t cure illnesses. A positive attitude is always a good thing, but it won’t cure illnesses, not the flu, not cancer, not depression.  Do try to find some happy thoughts to entertain, but most importantly seek medical treatment.  Any doctor can help you get access to people who specialize in helping people who suffer from depression, people who can work with you to determine what you need to help you get well.

Don’t believe depression’s lies.

And, don’t give up.

-gina

In the US, The National Suicide Prevention Hotline is 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)

If you think you’re having a psychiatric emergency call 911 (If available in your area, or your local emergency services telephone number, if it is not), or go to the nearest emergency room.

Do you suffer from depression, or have you in the past? Who did you talk to about it? Do you know someone with depression?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

We’ve been picnicking most of the weekend, as we celebrate Independence Day. So, my Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well post has been on my mind. Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well

There’s a whole lot of picnicking going on this weekend.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes our forays into the great outdoors are less than totally successful.

It’s usually about halfway through one of these great meetings of the lunchmeats meetups that I realize we’re heading for trouble.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well ...Gina's FavoritesOr, at least to the Urgent Care Center.

Here’s some clues to tip you off that there’s trouble ahead with an alfresco soirée (you would not believe how long it took me to get the spelling correct on “soirée”).

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Isn’t Gonna End Well

#10.  You parked so far away that you passed 3 county markers and the state line walking from your car to the picnic area.

#9.  You hear someone yell, “Hey look, Cousin Bubba brought his homemade fireworks!”

#8.  The potato salad has been in the sun so long it’s developed a pulse.

#7.  Cousin Beatrice has used the word “pus” four times, and she hasn’t even started to talk about when they had to lance that giant boil on her leg. Yet.

#6.  When you try to use the weather app on your phone to see how hot it is, Siri says. “Help me! I’m melting! I’m melting!!!”

#5.  Uncle Renfro is trying to play volleyball with a watermelon.  Again.

#4.  Just as you’re frantically feeling your pockets in search of your keys, your 5 year old son asks you, “Did you shut the trunk with your keys in there so they wouldn’t get lost?”

#3.  The ants have already carried off 1 cake, half the sandwiches, and Great Grandma Yaya, and it’s not even noon yet.

#2.  The Emergency Room called and asked what time the “friendly game of softball” will be starting this year, so they’ll know what time they should have the cast room open.

#1.  There’re more seagulls lined up in the trees around the food table than in the climax seen in The Birds, and you forgot your umbrella.

Don’t worry.  There’s probably a drive-thru burger place right next to the ER.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Do you like picnics? Are you a sandwich-er or a grill-er? Did you know how to spell “soirée”?  How bad were the bugs at your last picnic?  Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photo courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Sometimes Juice Spills …Gina’s Favorites

Sometimes Juice Spills …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

I picked my Sometimes Juice Spills post for Throwback Day this week, because it makes me giggle.

Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Sometimes Juice Spills

You know it’s going to be a good day when you start it off by finding a pimple the size of a can of soup sprouting out of the side of your neck.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Sometimes Juice Spills ...Gina's Favorites Marriage AcneWhere does it fall on the irony scale that I found the pimple while putting on my anti-wrinkle cream?

At first I thought it was a bug bite.  I was hoping it was a bug bite.  But it wasn’t a bug bite.

All doubt was removed when I found his mini-me brother sprouting up from the middle of the scar on my forehead.

If there was another one on the other side of my neck, and it was Halloween, I could have passed it off for a neck bolt.  But, just the one at this time of year leaves little option for disguise.

There is cover up. I coated it with that. Twice. It went from looking like a flare guiding aircraft landing on a carrier in the fog to more like a stubby thumb trying to hitch a ride.

A turtle neck would have covered it. Of course the 90 degree F weather around here this week would have made that less than comfortable. Plus, there’s my obsessive need to not let anything touch my neck.  I hate that feeling, so I don’t even own a turtle neck.

I guess my body didn’t hear about the “nothing touches my neck” rule before it started growing my third arm there.

But, I realized that I was probably making too big a deal out of this. We all focus on our own bodily imperfections, even though most people never notice them, much less give them a second glance. So, I decided not to worry about it and headed down to breakfast.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Sometimes Juice Spills ...Gina's Favorites Marriage Acne

The Professor did a double take as I sat down across from him at the breakfast table. “What the bloody ‘ell is that?” he asked, staring at my neck growth.

“I’m not sure,” I answered. “Might be a bug bite,” I suggested, hopefully.

“I don’t think so,” he said, looking intently at it.

“Does it look like a pimple?” I asked.

He shook his head.  “Not exactly,” he said.  “It looks more like the beginning of an alien emerging.”

Somehow his orange juice got dumped on his lap about then.

I have no idea how that happened.

Sometimes juice spills.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Ever been double “blessed” with the troubles of youth and the pains of aging at the same time?  Is your significant other super helpful when you’re feeling self-conscious?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Click over to my posts below for more fun with The Professor:

WHAT Is The Dog Sniffing Now?!?!

Early Morning Ambush

A Zen-Like Departure

Where’s My Sparkly?

 As always, the extra clicks count as cardio.

Thank you for reading and sharing.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.