Tuesday Tickles – ddvt

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Tuesday Tickles – ddvt Twitter MomSpeak KidSpeakTuesday Tickles – ddvt

Complied by Gina Valley

I love to share giggles.

Here’s some of the tweets that made me laugh in the last week.

 

Great tweets from great tweeps:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Be sure to follow me on Twitter so you don’t miss a laugh!

Laugh Loud Out!

-gina

What makes you smile?  Where do you turn when you need a giggle?  Do you have a favorite tweeter?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Don’t miss a giggle.  Be sure to “Like” up my Facebook page, and to share it with a friend.

Top 10 Signs It’s Winter In Los Angeles

Top 10 Signs It’s Winter In Los Angeles

by Gina Valley

Winter has come to Los Angeles.

“How can you tell?” non-SoCalifornians might wonder.

As always, I’m here to help you out.

Top 10 Signs It’s Winter In Los Angeles

#10.  Target is has brought out its swimwear selection.

#9.  The garden gnomes are all wearing Lands End down vests.

12-9-13aa

#8.  Your Los Angeles Facebook friends are posting complaints about how they had to wear socks to work.

#7.  There’s a guy near the flock of visiting geese at every park lake muttering, “It’s not ‘Canadian.’ It’s ‘Canada’ Geese!”

#6.  The spectators at sporting events are no longer dressed in shorts and t-shirts.  Now they’re wearing shorts and snow parkas.

#5.  All the Chihuahuas are wearing little, tiny snow boots.

#4.  WalMart has replaced its rubber flip flop collection with fur-lined flip flops.

#3.  Car windows are fogging up and no one is “auditioning” inside.

#2.  Store credit card purchases are down because people keep snapping their credit cards in half while trying to scrape the frost off their windshields.

#1. People have stopped complaining about the heat.

Bundle up, Buttercup!

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What’s winter like where you live?   Are you a fellow SoCal’er?  What’s your favorite sign of SoCal winter?   Shoot me a comment.   You’re here anyway & I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say.

The Best Laid Plans

The Best Laid Plans

by Gina Valley

Sometimes the best things are the things you didn’t plan for.

Yesterday was set to be a nonstop, rush around try-to-do-everything-and-be-everywhere kind of day.  I had kids competing in 3 different sports tournaments in 3 different cities.  I’d had a doubly full week and still had a big pile to finish from it.

I made my schedule, stressing over only being able to see only part of each child’s tournament and needing to have perfect traffic conditions to do even that.  I live in Los Angeles.  Perfect traffic conditions are few and far between.

I charged my laptop and hotspot and prepared to get some work done during warm ups and half times.

Poem Poetry Trees Humor Funny Humorous Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Kid Kids Child Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Grandpa Grandma Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Gina Valley Parenting Stillness Sunday The Best Laid Plans

It was a plan. A perfect plan. A perfectly stressful plan. But, what else is a Supermom to do?

She’s to throw all the planning out the window, whether she wants to or not.

That’s just what I did. I didn’t want to. I didn’t plan to. But, I had to.

When I rose to wake my children to begin our mad dash of a day, it was raining.  Not that lovely pitter patter that makes you think that winter is finally arriving and it’s time for hot chocolate and a good book.  The kind that makes you wonder if you need an ark.

I knew that rain spelled the end of my carefully diagramed and color coded plan.

Rain wouldn’t affect the tournaments.  One was a basketball tournament.  It’s held inside and they have heaters and sell hot chocolate. Two were soccer tournaments, and ankle deep water or marble sized hail won’t make soccer reschedule. Soccer is only cancelled if the field owner closes the fields or there’s lightening.  Neither of those was happening.

The rain triggered the end to my attempt to be everywhere because it removed any possibility of positive road conditions and my ability to get some work done on the sidelines.  Rushing on the roads in the rain is stupid and I refuse to do it.  My laptop doesn’t like to be wet, so it’d be staying home.

Time for a new plan.

We sent out a family contingent to each tournament, where they would remain for the duration of their assigned tournament.  No rushing to try to catch a game at one of the others.  No shuttling and juggling.  Just stay there.

I took my 12 year old to his soccer tournament.

I must say, it was an absolutely miserable day weather-wise.  But, at the end of the day, I realized it had been an absolutely glorious day relationship-wise.

I got to spend 12 hours one-on-one with my 12 year old.  Any parent of many will tell you that time with only one child is rare.  Twelve hours of it is almost unheard of.

For me, though, it was rarer than that.  You see, I can work anywhere.  That’s a blessing and a curse.  It allows me to be at kid-events that I would have to miss if I were tied to an office because I can work while I’m there, which I’m thankful for.  But, it also means that I have sometimes have to work while I’m at kid-events (or sit there feeling guilty, listening to deadlines flying by) even though I don’t want to.

But yesterday, thanks to the worst weather we’ve had in ages, I was isolated with my son with no possible way to work.  I was able to wholly focus on him, without feeling guilt from missing his siblings’ events or from pressing work obligations.

I never work while my kids are playing, but I usually do while their teams are warming up or off at halftime huddling around their coaches.  Yesterday, I was able to focus on watching my son during those “off” times.  Watching him goof around with his teammates reminded me what a joyful person he is.  He can find something to laugh about anywhere.  He had them all in stitches, even their stoic head coach.

In between games, instead of making the mad dash to get food, and then letting him run off to hang out with his teammates, the weather dictated that my son & I hang out in our van with the heater blasting after we got breakfast & hot chocolate.  We talked and giggled and even took a short power nap.  It was so nice that we repeated our break power nap later during the second break.

I got to spend what was going to be a rushed frazzled day, just hanging out with my kid, listening to his stories, seeing him in action, hearing him sleep.  He even gave me some career advice.

Yes it was cold and we were soaked.

Yes, they lost every game, some almost embarrassingly so.

Yes, I clearly suffered frost bite on my brain because we spent 2 hours in Costco on the way home.

But, being one-on-one with him for 12 hours was awesome.

I got something much better than my best laid plans.

Best.

Day.

Ever.

I hope your best laid plans get messed up, leaving something better in their wake, too.

Love!

-gina

Have you ever had a day where everything was right because everything went wrong?  Are you a “planner” or a “come-what-may’er”?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing what you think.

Photo courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission

Friday Funnies – dsvt

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley BlogFriday Funnies – dsvt

It’s Friday.

End of the week.

Start of the weekend.

 

Pull up a chair, and grab the beverage and snack of your choice.

Time to get your giggle on.

 

Friday Funnies –

Smiles From Around The World Wide Web

Complied by Gina Valley

Have you fanned me up on Facebook? If not, here’s your chance!  Click on over and hit “like” so you don’t miss a giggle (be sure to hover and select “Show in News Feed” while you’re at it, so Facebook will show you the giggles).

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Great advice!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Ours is the opposite now because our puppies pull all the lower ones off. Our tree isn’t exactly up to “Martha” standards this year.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
What if you yell :Uno!”?

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
This is a great idea! I’m so trying it, as soon as some one makes sure there are no spiders down by those cords.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
I’m making a copy of this for my friend, Linda, who is a nearly a Professional Black Friday Shopper to take with her next year. I’m too scared to go.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
I wish someone had told me that!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
I’ve used this chart myself. It works great. Very accurate.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Oh what I’d give for a nap!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
If we paid stay at home parents what they’re worth, everyone would need three jobs.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Our dogs are too goofy to feel guilty! They’d proudly lead me to it!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Freaks me out when that happens!

Be sure to visit the Gina Valley Facebook page and to “like” me up.

 

Some Of My Favorite Pins On Pinterest:

Consider this your formal invitation to check out all of my boards on Pinterest.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
And, realistic, too! The kids are bickering. My 12 year old pointed that out to me.

 

I could use the cardio.
I could use the cardio.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Look VERY closely. Hee hee!
“You had one job!”

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
I sometimes can’t brain for a week!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
Getting that right is almost as effective as giving me shoes.

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Friday Funnies – dsvt FaceBook Pinterest Gina Valley Blog
I would not be able to choose! Too much pressure! Aaaahhh!!!

All the rest of my pins for the week are here on my Latest Great Pins Board.

If you’re trying to put off making dinner, you can check out all of my boards on Pinterest.

 

This Week On The Gina Valley Blog:

My Pause post included my verse Peace.

My recent humor posts include

Friday Funnies – ovnvt (a weeks worth of funnies),

Spray Away For The Holiday  (all you need for a perfect holiday is a can of gold spray paint),

Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! …Gina’s Favorites (the battle over holiday lights),

Tuesday Tickles – dtvt (a week’s worth of funny quips),

Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad (what a dad really needs to know),

Near Death Shopping Experience…Gina’s Favorites (running toward the light in the discount store).

I hope they gave you some giggles, too.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina             

What made you smile this week? Did you have a good week?  Any big plans this weekend?  Have you scheduled time to relax?  I’m looking forward to hearing about it!  Shoot me a comment with all the details!

Near Death Shopping Experience…Gina’s Favorites

Near Death Shopping Experience…Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

So, I’m in line at the discount store.

You know, the one you don’t have to comb your hair to go to?  The one that, judging by several of the women who paraded by, is also bra optional.

As is typical, 4 of the 206 registers were open.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Near Death Shopping Experience …Gina’s FavoritesI naively thought I was lucky in landing only 4 back from the register.  After all, how long could this possibly take?  Famous last words!

After having moved exactly NOT AT ALL!!! after literally 20 minutes I realized those might be my last words.  I looked at The Professor and said, “I think we will die here.”

“When you see the light try to fall into the cart, so I don’t have to drag your body through the line,” he answered, practical to the end.

I was not the only one performing last rights.  There were multitudes fading fast in every lane.  Tempers were shorter than the lines were long.  Holiday cynicism was at a peak.

But, as I stood there corralled by the Not-Available-IN-Stores merchandise and a rack of Pillow Pet Jrs., staring at the distant cashier as she moved at nearly the speed of slow motion, something caught my eye.  It was a glimmer of hope. A spark of life.

I suddenly felt the will to live re-entering my body.

I could feel it swelling up within me until I was sure I would burst.  I had to tell someone.  I looked at The Professor.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Near Death Shopping Experience …Gina’s FavoritesHe was standing next to me, leaning against the Pillow Pets and the Not-Available-In-Stores Tortilla Bowl Shapers.  He seemed to be deep in thought studying the empty gum cases.

I hated to  disturb him, but I had to tell someone, and everyone else in our line, aside from being perfect strangers, seem to be either angry, comatose, or both.  I decided to go ahead and wake The Professor up.

I jabbed his arm.  Repeatedly.  He finally woke up, muttering, “Whoa, debit.  No! Credit.”

“Honey,” I whispered excitedly.

He leaned back against the magazines and said, “Five more minutes,” and then flopped his hand on my head, apparently looking for the snooze button.

“Wake up.  Wake up!” I implored as I shook him.

As he regained lucidity and checked his watch, he asked, “Is it our turn?”

I laughed.  That man is so funny. Like it could be our turn.  We’d only been in line for 25 minutes at that point.  We hadn’t even moved.  “No, but look.  Look at his cart,” I said, while pointing at the cart the guy in front of us was pushing.

“Yeah?  So?  It’s full. Wake me up when we move forward more than 24 inches,” he mumbled as he rearranged his Tortilla Bowl Shaper pile pillow.

“But, look at it,” I implored.  “Look what he’s buying.”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Near Death Shopping Experience …Gina’s FavoritesThe Professor opened both eyes and looked intently toward the cart in question. Then, he looked quizzically at giddy, fidgety me.

I’m sure he was a bit unnerved by my smile, which was undoubtedly wrapped all of the way around my head at that point. Probably, memories of past cart content alerts from me, like the time I spotted the creepy man buying only marshmallows, Spaghetti O’s, and 15 boxes of condoms, weighed heavily on his mind.  He thinks I shouldn’t look in other people’s carts.  I’ve told him that I have to because it’s material for my job (like right now!). He said that I couldn’t quote what he said after that.

Our cart was full of exciting discount store staples like socks, deodorant, Lean Cuisines, sweatpants, and paper plates. I might have tossed one of those Tortilla Bowl Shapers in there, too.

The guy in front of me had a cart full of colored pencils, a pile of arts and craft sets, 4 big boxes of crayons, 3 Easy Bake Ovens, 2 dolls, a stack of picture books, 2 Little Tykes trucks, a tub of Legos, and a bunch of glittery hair ties.  There was festive paper and bows on the rack underneath.

We were shopping for daily life & hygiene essentials.  He was not.

I quietly said to The Professor, “He’s Christmas shopping for kids.”  I think I squealed a little, because he gave me that look.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Near Death Shopping Experience …Gina’s FavoritesI don’t know why, but for some reason just knowing that he was there to do something nice for children made me happy.  It made me pep right up.

The Professor looked at the cart again.  At first he had his “I will humor my crazy wife.  Again.” look on his face, but I noticed a smile rapidly taking over.  “He is, isn’t he?” The Professor said to me.  “Definitely has a cart full of kids’ gifts.”

It’s obviously not unusual to see someone Christmas shopping the first week of December, but there is something special about seeing a cart solely devoted to children’s gifts.  I’m not sure why it’s so special.

Maybe because it’s rare to see a cart filled only with toys.  Maybe because we all love the thrill of being a child at Christmas. Maybe because a little kid started this whole Christmas thing.  I don’t know.  But I do know that I wasn’t the only one who soaked up some joy and holiday energy just looking at that buggy full of kids’ stuff.

The guy behind us pointed it out to his wife.  The kid in the basket behind them craned his neck to see.  His mom smiled when she caught sight of it.  Pretty soon people in the lines on either side of ours began to notice.  People stood straighter, straining to see.  Scowls melted. Smiles appeared.  All across what had been a bastion of human misery joy spread.

It was just for a few minutes.  We’d all be on our way soon. Hopefully.

But, there was something exciting, renewing about seeing how a basket of toys melts the hearts of a bunch of tired people who haven’t been kids for a long time.

I don’t know if it was the Christmas Spirit or not.  But, somehow I’m sure the original Christmas Kid was smiling, too.

Laugh Out Loud,

-gina

What springs to your mind when you see a bunch of toys?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it!

Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad

Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad

by Gina Valley

Today is my Dad’s birthday.  He’s only got the one a year, so I like to do something special for it. This year, I thought I’d share a little bit about him.

My dad’s a pretty amazing guy.  In fact, the older I get, the smarter he gets!

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad He’s truly got this whole dad-thing down.  In fact, you can’t find a better example.  If you’re wondering what you need to be a real dad for the long haul, let him help you out:

Top 10 Ways to Be A Real Dad

#10.  You’ll need to develop a unique linguistic style.  My dad has his own language.  He’s the only person I know who uses phrases like “Dab gum it!” or “Don’t be a panty waist!” (I’m still not sure what that means exactly, but I always took it to mean “Quit your whining and move your arse”).

#9.  You’ll need to be consistent.  Every April 1st my dad goes out to check my mom’s car’s tires, because every April 1st my mom tells him, as an April Fool’s joke, that her car has a flat.  Even though he usually remembers it’s April 1st long before he gets to her car, he still checks.  Just to be sure.  Then, he goes back in the house and plays a joke on my mom. I’m predicting fake dog deposits this year, as they have a new puppy.

#8.  You’ll need to develop quality control systems.  My dad reloads the dishwasher after I load it. Every time.  Even at my house.  Of course, I do the same thing to him.  Apple.  Tree.  All that.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad #7.  You’ll need to find your center.  My dad is the most even keeled guy I know.  I’ve seen him get his finger caught in an electric auger and barely raise his voice. I screamed at my kids for letting the dog eat the Parmesan cheese last night (in my defense, the dog had run all over our house shaking the container as he went, thoroughly garnishing our home with a fine cheese coating. Nothing like a well garnished home to produce a “scream at someone” kind of moment).

#6.  You’ll need duct tape and a tool belt.  My dad can fix anything.  Anything.  If he doesn’t have the needed tool he’ll get it.  If they don’t make the tool, he’ll make it himself.  I’ve never heard my dad say “I can’t fix that.” He looks at stuff differently, through Dad-vision glasses.  I might see a former seating device, he sees a perfectly good chair that just needs 2 legs, an arm, a back, and a seat.

#5.  You’ll need a rod and reel.  My dad’s an amazing fisherman.  If there’s a fish the lake, he’ll bring it home for dinner.  I’m a pretty amazing fisherperson myself.  If there’s wild caught salmon at Costco, I’ll wrassle a package into my cart every time.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad #4.  You’ll need to speak “auto” and carry a big wrench.  My dad is The Car-Whisperer.  He’s rebuilt engines himself, left out a couple pieces, and still made it hum like new.  I, on the other hand, am The Car-Killer.  I’ve had cars burst into flames just because I thought about being on time to a meeting.

#3.  You’ll need to be a nutritionist.  My dad always makes sure people get just what they need to eat.  When my eldest child was only a few months old, my dad knew he needed some ice cream, and made sure he got some.   I admit I wasn’t completely supportive of the idea at the time, but the fact that he chose Rocky Road to feed my little toothless wonder might have impacted my opinion.


#2.  You’ll need to be a chef of haute cuisine.
  When I was a child and my dad would cook a meal, he always cooked everything in one pan.  When we’d ask why he didn’t use separate pans for different foods, he’d reply, “Why? It’s all going to the same place.”  Often, when I survey the mountain of pots and pans I’ve dirtied making dinner, I see the wisdom in my dad’s method.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Top 10 Ways to Be A REAL Dad

#1.  You’ll need to realize that your kids will always be your kids.  My dad still dad’s me to this day, even as I have kids of my own.  He makes sure I have a coat on when it’s cold.  He reminds me to drive safely.  He tells me I need to eat more protein.  In other words, he loves me.

 

Take a page from my dad, and you’ll be amazing.

And, no, you don’t have a flat tire.  Probably.

Well, you better go check.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What do you see in the dads in your life?  What dad-isms should I add to my list?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Tuesday Tickles – dtvt

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Tuesday Tickles – dtvt Twitter MomSpeak KidSpeakTuesday Tickles – dtvt

Complied by Gina Valley

I love to share giggles.

Here’s some of the tickles that made me laugh in the last week.

 


Be sure to follow me on Twitter so you don’t miss a laugh!

 

Momspeak

(stuff I can hardly believe I said out loud to my pack this week):

Do not throw the cranberry sauce.

You can’t make pickles with chicken broth.

Of course no one killed the turkey. It just got old  and died.

 

Kidspeak

(stuff I can hardly believe one of my pack said to me this week):

Can we hang Jello on the tree?

I think the puppy ate your deodorant, because his breath smells like you.

Did you comb your hair like that on purpose? 

 

Laugh Loud Out!

-gina

What makes you smile?  Where do you turn when you need a giggle?  Do you have a favorite tweeter?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Don’t miss a giggle.  Be sure to “Like” up my Facebook page, and to share it with a friend.

Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! …Gina’s Favorites

Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

With Thanksgiving under our belt, we’ve passed through the official time for the “Fresh VS Frozen Turkey” debate, and are now poised to begin arguing about Christmas lighting options.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! ...Gina's Favorites Lights DecoratingChristmas lights are truly a defining force in our culture.  You give me a light decorating opportunity and I can give you a complete psychological run down of everyone involved.

My Call of Duty fan son argues that we should put a tank in the yard, made of lights, because that’s what Jesus would do.

My teenage daughters argue that the lights are embarrassing.

My young children want more.  More characters.  More lights.  More colors.  More everything.  The crasser the better in their eyes.

My son’s boss wants precise, measured spacing between the rows of lights they hang in bushes and trees. My son points out that the first tiny gust of wind through the trees will “adjust” the spacing. Point to my son.  His boss argues that he signs the pay checks. Match to his boss.  His boss is afraid to climb the ladder, so it’s still anyone’s game.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! ...Gina's Favorites Lights DecoratingThe Professor likes the lights to flash.  But, not all the lights.  Most of the lights flash, with an occasional random strand left steadily glowing.

My dad is the opposite. The lights at his house are all steadfastly glowing, save for a couple of random strands, which appear to be having some sort of electrical problem amongst their glowing neighbors.

I say make a decision and go all in, one way or the other.

One of our neighbors has a strictly elegant and classy display every year.  It centers around a beautiful, life-sized Nativity display.  I have to admit that it puts our inflatable Nativity to shame. On the other hand ours never seems to move and watch me as I jog by in the evening.

There is the unending debate about putting icicle lights versus straight lights around your roofline.  People were less opinionated about the Civil War than this issue. Nothing quite embodies the Spirit of Christmas like 2 grown men rolling around on the lawn, trying not to spill their beers, while one hollers at the other, “They don’t look like icicles. They just look stupid!”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! ...Gina's Favorites Lights DecoratingA guy down our street is into strobe lights for the holiday season. Woodland creatures gathered in his yard look like they’re at some sort of forest night club. The flashing has triggered seizures in one raccoon and two squirrels. I hate to think what’s going to happen when it triggers them in a skunk. This guy is single. I’m not saying it’s because of his lighting g choices. I’m just providing you with the information to form your own opinion.

Most of my pack argues in favor of multi-colored lights.  I argue for white lights because they’re simple and elegant, and they won’t look as stupid 2 months after Christmas when they’re still up, because we can pass them off as party decorations.

My friend Jeanie’s parents no longer argue about whether the Christmas lights need to come down 2 months or even 10 months after Christmas.  They have reached an armistice on that one.  No, they argue about whether to plug them in every night.

That’s right, this past May, when their Christmas lights (and their giant wreath on the second story, too, but that’s really material for a different column) were still in place, her mom finally stopped asking her dad to take them down, and instead requested that he stop plugging them in every night.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Don’t You DARE Put That In Our Yard! ...Gina's Favorites Lights DecoratingNow, I would normally be appalled by the nightly highlighting of the long past-their-purpose decorations, but I’m thinking maybe lighting those puppies up in May is the right way to go.

The way I see it, although other people may have left their Christmas lights up, no one is lighting them in May.  So, the twinkling colorful bulbs could serve the public in many ways. They could guide weary travelers through the fog (there could be fog in May), or provide a location bench mark for iPhone users when our iMaps poops out (“Turn left when you see the Christmas lights.  Yes. Christmas lights.”).

I need to ask Jeanie if they are twinkling or steady glowing lights.

I’d be willing to bet that the Wise Men argued about which kind of incense to bring to the first Christmas.

I guess we’re just keeping that spirit alive.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What decorations generate “discussion” in your neck of the woods?  Which ones do you love?  Which ones do you hope a freak wind will blast through and blow away?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Are you hanging out with me on Facebook and Twitter, too?  If not, let’s hook up and laugh together today!  And, be sure to sign up for my email notifications at the top of this page so you don’t miss a giggle.

Pause

Pause

by Gina Valley

Poem Poetry Trees Humor Funny Humorous Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Kid Kids Child Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Grandpa Grandma Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Gina Valley Parenting Stillness Sunday Pause Peace Quiet Thoughts

Peace

Trouble flown

Breath savored

Thoughts quell

Harmony sings

Hush spreads

Calm flows

Tranquil grace

Beautiful still

-gina valley

 

There’s something beautiful about quiet.

It’s a rare thing in my life.  Probably in yours, as well.  Even without children and spouses and pets, our world is filled with noise and intrusions.   It’s hard to complete a thought with the constant interruptions.

We’ve learned to adapt, to make decisions and to carry on, in the midst of the chaos of life.  We have to.  Life rarely gives us a pause.

But, I need a pause.  We all need a pause.  So, we have to force ourselves to take it.

I love the feeling of peace in my house when I rise before everyone else.  I can almost taste the peace, as I breathe it in.  That’s one of the reasons I consistently rise before, not only my children, spouse, and neighbors, but also the sun.

My work is essentially putting thoughts to paper.   Well, thoughts to a word processor is, I suppose, more accurate.  I need that quiet for clarity.  Otherwise my mind feels like muddy water, and I’m unable to grasp the thoughts, much less hold on to them long enough to type them out.

Much as I need the quiet for work, I need it even more for me.  I need to have a quiet time daily to nourish my soul.

When my life feels too heavy and the weight starts to crush me, invariably I haven’t been having a quiet time.  I suppose, in a way that makes sense.  When I’m stressed because I’m extra busy, when I find myself well off the path, I’m less likely to take that 45 minutes to be alone to read The Word and to pray.  But, at the same time, it’s almost ridiculous that I don’t take that time, because when I am stressed and busy is when I need it most.

It never ceases to amaze me that I will fail to do what I know is best for me in the long run, so that I can deal with something of short term value.  Don’t tell my family I’ve admitted this, but I think I’m a bit hard headed.

This time of year has extra stress.  I need, you need, we all need to make it a point to take a pause daily, even if it’s just a short one.  We need to sit and listen to nourish ourselves.

We all have too much to do.  So, if we really want to get as much of it done as possible, we need to force ourselves to stop doing it, and to take a pause every day.

Give yourself that gift this season.  Take 30 minutes to sit quietly, alone, uninterrupted.  You’ll really be giving a gift to everyone in your life, because, not only will your pause of action set a valuable example, it will make you a better you.

Love!

-gina

Do you try to have a daily quiet time?  What do you think is the key to it?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Spray Away For The Holiday

Spray Away For The Holiday 

by Gina Valley

Remember when your pre-school kids brought home macaroni frames and sea shells magically transformed by gold spray paint?  Well, that still works.  A can or 2 or 30 of gold (or silver) spray paint  can transform your home, change your life, and have you totally ready for the holidays before lunch.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Spray Away For The Holiday Decorating  Christmas  Hanukah  New YearsWhat, you might wonder, can one spray paint gold, besides macaroni frames and sea shells?

Well, the traditionalists will tell you to blast some pines cones to place in a large glass bowl for an elegant look.  That does look nice, but I say “Why stop there?”

Kitchen buried in crusty dishes?  Spray paint those suckers.  Now you have charger plates each with a custom, handmade 3-dimensional design.  Macy’s will probably call you with an order for 1000 of them.

Mountain of laundry besieging your washing machine?  No problem.  Arrange the olfactory offenders into various sizes of conical piles.  Blast them with your can of magic gold-ness (this might require more than one coat), and you’ll be left with an entire forest of handmade, fabric Christmas trees to distribute throughout your home and yard.  Talk about classy décor!

Got a lazy teen?  Or two?  Do you have to put a mirror under his nose to check for condensation just to be sure he hasn’t passed on to that great messy bedroom in the sky, because he’s been prone on the living room sofa for 22 hours?  Spray him! Don’t worry, he’ll likely sleep through the whole thing and Christmas and New Year’s.  Your guests will be so impressed with how life-like the new sculpture in your living room is.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Spray Away For The Holiday Decorating  Christmas  Hanukah  New YearsCobwebs in the corners make you feel like you’re closer to Halloween, than a visit from St. Nick?  No worries.  A light spraying, and you’ve turned those bug catchers into delicate gold garland.

Did your 3 year old stain the fancy dress your mother-in-law sent her before she’d even worn it?  Gold that thing up, and you’ll take it from “stained” to “lamé -d.”

Living room rug speckled with stains?  Spray paint a large circle over each one, for a festive, new flooring up date.  Or, for a totally new, easy to clean look, spray paint the whole carpet – wall-to-wall .  It’ll  look holiday-delicious and you can hose away spills.

How about your yard?  Landscaping looking like the Munster’s house?  Pots filled with dead daisies?  Brown lawn?  Bent flamingoes?  Nothing a couple cans of gold spray paint can’t fix.  Let loose with the golds of spray paint land, and change barren into lushness, change dreary into opulence.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Totally Spray Away For The Holiday Decorating  Christmas  Hanukah  New YearsNo time to wrap gifts?  Spray them.

Cat make some hairballs?  Spray them.

Spouse balding?  Spray him.

Sagging patio furniture?  Dented mail box?  Dingy guest towels?  Spray.  Spray.  Spray!!!

And, if Martha Stewart or the president of you HOA shows up at your door to complain about your efforts, spray paint her, too.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Anything in your life that could use a good spraying?   When do you put up your decorations?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photo courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission