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Tag Archives Gina Valley

The Great Watermelon Stampede of ’17

Did you know there are 53 watermelons in that giant, super-sturdy cardboard bin at Costco? Did you know if your 5 year old aims carefully and hits the giant super-sturdy cardboard bin full of watermelons with the corner of the pretty-big, apparently-even-sturdier-than-the-cardboard-bin shopping cart, the giant, super-sturdy cardboard bin will magically split open?

Did you know when the bin splits open 48 of the 53 watermelons will make a run for it?

Are You A Dad-er?

Do you do the daddy-ing?

Maybe you’re a father. Maybe you’re not.

Either way, the daddy-ing dads, stepdads, uncles, grandpas, brothers, cousins, neighbors, teachers, coaches, and many more do makes a huge difference for the better in the lives of the children they daddy.

Know that all of your efforts for the children in your life are appreciated and world changing, even if they aren’t acknowledged.

Why The Funny Hat?

Why do we hike 2 miles through mud and over sod in our favorite heels to bake in full sun for 3 ½ hours, all the while wondering who invented pantyhose and whether it’s too late to kill him?

The graduates. We do it for the graduates.

I’ve got some questions for these knowledge-soaked, gown-draped, funny-hatted, glistening individuals.

What’s with your hats? A mortarboard?

Folding Chair Follies

It’s that time of year again.

Time to shake and bake while our loved ones stride across the stage.

You want to be a graduation audience member? Let’s see if you’ve got the endurance, savvy, and possibly even stupidity necessary to make the grade.

Ahhh – the audience – that group of adoring fans that entertains delusions of homicide as the ceremony plods along. At least a lot of them are darn entertaining,

Just Because You’re At Graduation Doesn’t Mean You’re Smart!!!

Just Because You’re At Graduation Doesn’t Mean You’re Smart!!!
by Gina Valley

I was subjected to unjustifiable torture this weekend.

That’s right, I attended a graduation ceremony.

My nephew, my older sister’s son (she says that I don’t need to point out she’s older. But, I do need to. Because she’s older. Much, much older. And, she always made me be Ken when we played Barbies when I was little.) (Actually,

I’ll Just Poke Myself In The Eye

You know how sometimes you impress your family and friends with your skill and competence?

Yeah, me neither.

Last night a little moth flew straight into my face, landed on my nose, freaked out, and tried to fly away. But, he must have forgotten how he got there (or maybe he just had a poor sense of direction. Not judging here. Just reporting) (Although I am pretty sure he’s male,