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Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

We’ve been picnicking most of the weekend, as we celebrate Independence Day. So, my Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well post has been on my mind. Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well

There’s a whole lot of picnicking going on this weekend.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes our forays into the great outdoors are less than totally successful.

It’s usually about halfway through one of these great meetings of the lunchmeats meetups that I realize we’re heading for trouble.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well ...Gina's FavoritesOr, at least to the Urgent Care Center.

Here’s some clues to tip you off that there’s trouble ahead with an alfresco soirée (you would not believe how long it took me to get the spelling correct on “soirée”).

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Isn’t Gonna End Well

#10.  You parked so far away that you passed 3 county markers and the state line walking from your car to the picnic area.

#9.  You hear someone yell, “Hey look, Cousin Bubba brought his homemade fireworks!”

#8.  The potato salad has been in the sun so long it’s developed a pulse.

#7.  Cousin Beatrice has used the word “pus” four times, and she hasn’t even started to talk about when they had to lance that giant boil on her leg. Yet.

#6.  When you try to use the weather app on your phone to see how hot it is, Siri says. “Help me! I’m melting! I’m melting!!!”

#5.  Uncle Renfro is trying to play volleyball with a watermelon.  Again.

#4.  Just as you’re frantically feeling your pockets in search of your keys, your 5 year old son asks you, “Did you shut the trunk with your keys in there so they wouldn’t get lost?”

#3.  The ants have already carried off 1 cake, half the sandwiches, and Great Grandma Yaya, and it’s not even noon yet.

#2.  The Emergency Room called and asked what time the “friendly game of softball” will be starting this year, so they’ll know what time they should have the cast room open.

#1.  There’re more seagulls lined up in the trees around the food table than in the climax seen in The Birds, and you forgot your umbrella.

Don’t worry.  There’s probably a drive-thru burger place right next to the ER.

Laugh Out Loud!


Do you like picnics? Are you a sandwich-er or a grill-er? Did you know how to spell “soirée”?  How bad were the bugs at your last picnic?  Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photo courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

2 Responses
  • Mary Wallace
    July 4, 2015

    What a great 4th here in Tampa, I tells ya! Just as I get ready to comment, the lights go out! Not because some yahoo shot out the transformer. Transformer-shooting starts at 9:15 pm sharp, I’m told, but because we’re having the most high-falutin’ gosh-awful thunderstorms now. It saves the City of Tampa money on the ACTUAL fireworks! Of course the dimbulb mayor went ahead and bought ’em for tomorrow night, but it will rain, so we’ll probably be celebrating the 43th of July, or there abouts. Meantime, the distribution problem is messed up; we should be sending all of this hoo-haa to you!

    Anyway, Mama and I are just hunkered down waiting for the semi-autos and the SAM displays. It’s just us now and we’re doing okay. I hope you and your pack and the crazy perfessor are well, Gina! All my love; I’m getting back in the groove, plus playing “Viola Fight Songs!” (A story for another time!) <3

    • gina valley
      July 14, 2015

      We could really use those storms and rain out here in California, Mary. I have friends in Texas who also seem to have more rain than they can handle, much less need. It’s too bad there isn’t an efficient way to ship it all out west!.

      I glad to see you’ve been writing, and playing. Always a great thing! Looking forward to more!