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The Glamorous Life Of The Modern Day Soccer Mom

gina valley - The Glamorous Life Of The Modern Day Soccer Mom

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

We’ve been picnicking most of the weekend, as we celebrate Independence Day. So, my Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well post has been on my mind. Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well

There’s a whole lot of picnicking going on this weekend.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes our forays into the great outdoors are less than totally successful.

It’s usually about halfway through one of these great meetings of the lunchmeats meetups that I realize we’re heading for trouble.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs This Picnic Is NOT Gonna End Well ...Gina's FavoritesOr, at least to the Urgent Care Center.

Here’s some clues to tip you off that there’s trouble ahead with an alfresco soirée (you would not believe how long it took me to get the spelling correct on “soirée”).

Top 10 Signs This Picnic Isn’t Gonna End Well

#10.  You parked so far away that you passed 3 county markers and the state line walking from your car to the picnic area.

#9.  You hear someone yell, “Hey look, Cousin Bubba brought his homemade fireworks!”

#8.  The potato salad has been in the sun so long it’s developed a pulse.

#7.  Cousin Beatrice has used the word “pus” four times, and she hasn’t even started to talk about when they had to lance that giant boil on her leg. Yet.

#6.  When you try to use the weather app on your phone to see how hot it is, Siri says. “Help me! I’m melting! I’m melting!!!”

#5.  Uncle Renfro is trying to play volleyball with a watermelon.  Again.

#4.  Just as you’re frantically feeling your pockets in search of your keys, your 5 year old son asks you, “Did you shut the trunk with your keys in there so they wouldn’t get lost?”

#3.  The ants have already carried off 1 cake, half the sandwiches, and Great Grandma Yaya, and it’s not even noon yet.

#2.  The Emergency Room called and asked what time the “friendly game of softball” will be starting this year, so they’ll know what time they should have the cast room open.

#1.  There’re more seagulls lined up in the trees around the food table than in the climax seen in The Birds, and you forgot your umbrella.

Don’t worry.  There’s probably a drive-thru burger place right next to the ER.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Do you like picnics? Are you a sandwich-er or a grill-er? Did you know how to spell “soirée”?  How bad were the bugs at your last picnic?  Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photo courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!!

Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!!

by Gina Valley

July 4th is a big day here in the United States.  It’s our birthday!

We love to celebrate, and having something we can all celebrate makes it extra special.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!! 4th of July Independence DaySo, Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!!

239 years look great on you!

Here’s a few thoughts for your birthday – some serious, some silly:

Let freedom never perish in your hands – Joseph Addison

Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army?  He was a Yankee doodler!

Those who won our independence believed liberty to be the secret of happiness and courage to be the secret of liberty – Louis D. Brandeis

Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better – Albert Camus

The difference between a duck and George Washington is:  One has a bill on his face; the other has his face on a bill!

Liberty is the breath of life to nations – George Bernard Shaw

We must be free not because we claim freedom, but because we practice it – William Faulkner

The 4th of July is coming up and you know what that means! Time to use Sparklers as wands and shoot spells at people again! And, to write your name in the air!

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!! 4th of July Independence Day

From every mountain side – Let Freedom ring – Samuel F. Smith, “America”

What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?  Liberty!

Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves – Abraham Lincoln

Freedom is the oxygen of the soul – Moshe Dayan

What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?   The Battle of Bonkers Hill.

This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave – Elmer Davis

What did one flag say to the other flag?  Nothing. It just waved!

He that would make his own liberty secure, must guard even his enemy from opposition; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach himself  - Thomas Paine

Food, Family, Fourth of July, and Fireworks. The four best F-words ever!

 

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!! 4th of July Independence DayDid you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?   Yeah, it cracked me up!

If our country is worth dying for in time of war let us resolve that it is truly worth living for in time of peace – Hamilton Fish

What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?   The Americans licked the British!

People have forgotten what the 4th of July really is. It’s the day we got the freedom we use every day. It’s not fireworks and parties. That’s just what makes it fun.

Why were the first Pennsylvania settlers like ants?   Because they lived in colonies.

American Soldiers don’t fight because they hate what’s in front of them.  They fight because they LOVE what’s behind them!

What’s red, white, blue, and ugly?  A revolutionary warthog!

 

Being an American is awesome. The end.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Happy, Happy Birthday, USA!!! 4th of July Independence DayWhy did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?   Because the horse was too heavy to carry!

Thank you to our Veterans on this 4th of July.

What was General Washington’s favorite tree?   The infantry!

Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth – John F Kennedy

Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it – Thomas Paine

Liberty is always dangerous, but it is the safest thing we have – Harry Emerson Fosdick

7,000 people were treated in emergency rooms for injuries sustained from fireworks. Don’t be a statistic.  Let your friend light the fuse!

Never forget – freedom is never free – Victor Killingsworth

Be safe, be sane, and have a joyous day!

Celebrate & Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What do you love about your homeland?  How do you celebrate it?  Shoot me a comment.  I look forward to hearing all about it!

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Drills We NEED To Have …Gina’s Favorites

Drills We NEED To Have …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

Summer is in full swing at our house, so I think it’s a good time to review some helpful drills.

Drills We Actually NEED To Have

My kids’ school had a fire drill the last day of school.  I’m not sure they really benefitted from that one.  Let’s face it, few of us ever benefitted from the monthly fire drill at school beyond getting some extra time to mess around and maybe to push off a math test.

Funny Humor Drills Summer http://ginavalley.com/  Drills We NEED To Have ...Gina's Favorites  – Laugh All About It!But, since school has primed our kids to be ready for drills, why not take advantage of their readiness and run some drills that will actually help life run more smoothly this summer?

Not sure what to drill your family on or how to go about it?  Fear not! My kids have stomach flu this week, so, since I was up all night, I put this handy dandy drilling list together for you.

Shoe Retrieval Drill - Just once I’d like to leave the house with my entire pack wearing shoes.  I know that’s never going to happen, so I figure the next best thing is to work on their shoe retrieval skills.

Begin this drill after everyone is securely buckled into their seats in the family vehicle. At the sound of the key entering the ignition family members are to rapidly exit the vehicle and run back into the house to get a pair of shoes.  Extra points will be awarded for any runner who retrieves 2 of his or her own shoes.  Double point bonuses are scored if the two shoes match each other AND currently fit the runner.  Laces present or working zippers in both shoes earn a triple bonus!

Beach Loo Drill - Why is it a child’s need to visit the facilities increases directly with the distance your beach blanket is from those facilities?

Begin this drill by finding the perfect spot for your beach blanket. You’ll know you’ve found the perfect spot when the building for the facilities appears to be a mere dot on the horizon.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Drills We NEED To Have ...Gina's Favorites Drills SummerEveryone should be wearing uncomfortable shoes that fill easily with sand or cheap flip flops that come apart every two or three steps.  Immediately prior to beginning the drill each participant must be thoroughly soaked with ocean water to maximize stickiness and chaffing.

At the sounding of the whiny “I gotta go now!” all participants must rush directly to the facilities, running with their legs crossed the last half of the journey.

Moreover, each participant must wait out in the wind for his or her turn to enter the facilities, as no matter how many potential depositories there are only one is ever functional.

Each wind-chilled, soaked and chaffing participant must enter the facilities, remove his or her wet bathing suit, which undoubtedly has decided to become a permanent part of the participant’s body, complete off loading, file the paperwork, and re-don his or her bathing suit.

Note:  participants must complete the in-facility part of this drill while simultaneously holding his or her breath as protection from the grievously noxious odors, and complaining constantly about the unsanitary state of the facilities and lack of proper supplies.

Bonus points given for getting the wet bathing suit back on in such a manner that all vital areas are covered on the first try.  Double bonus points are given if the suit never touches the grungy bathroom floor.  Triple bonus points are awarded to any participant who brought along his or her own paperwork supplies.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Drills We NEED To Have ...Gina's Favorites Drills SummerRV Barfing Drill - What is it about camping in an RV that invariably causes a young family member to need to suddenly, violently, often projectile-ly re-visit, usually into the only pair of shoes his or her dad brought?

Begin this drill with the sound of a wretch.

Everyone is to make their way quickly out of the RV, hiding hard to clean items, such as shoes or school books along the way, as they proceed rapidly to the designated outdoor approved revisiting location.

Bonus points are given for weaving through the shoe gauntlet near the RV bedroom without tripping, and for not falling off those nasty black metal stairs-of-death on the way out.

Note: This drill can also be adapted for time spent in SUV and passenger cars, or for specific re-visiting vacation needs, such as for Son#4 who revisits anytime he eats anything orange.

Emergency Dinnering – Why is it so impossible to have dinner at a decent hour during the summer?

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Drills We NEED To Have ...Gina's Favorites Drills SummerStart this drill at 8:45pm, when it is getting dark and you’ve realized no one ever made, much less ate, dinner because it hadn’t started to get dark yet.

Use only the food you ALWAYS have on hand but never use, including that lone can of garbanzo beans, the slightly wilted bag of lettuce, 4 stiff tortillas, a can of SPAM, whatever is in those two spice jars with no labels, and that rapidly dehydrating, half un-wrapped block of cheddar in the back of the meat drawer.

Bonus points are scored if you have company over to eat dinner with you the night of this drill. Double bonus points are earned if you are able to grill the entire meal prior to running out of propane.

Emergency Cell Phone Call Drill – Why is it that we can never locate our cell phone for those once a year moments when we actually really need to make a call with it, like when someone’s bleeding or there’s a fire or we’re out of ice cream?

It’s smart to run this drill periodically throughout the year.  Start by having one of your children either shove your cell phone down a sofa or fire up a raging game of Angry Birds.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Drills We NEED To Have ...Gina's Favorites Drills Summer

At the sound of the alarm assume a life threatening emergency is occurring.  As quickly as you can, locate and retrieve your cell-phone WITHOUT having someone call it.

Bonus points if it’s the first cell phone you pull out of the sofa cushions.

Double bonus points if you can figure out how to shut off Angry Birds so that you can make the 911 call without those bloody birds squawking in the background.

If your cell phone has 21% or greater charge at the time of the drill you earn a triple bonus.

Let’s be prepared out there!

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Are you prepared for summer “emergency” situations?  Drop me a comment.  I look forward to hearing all about it!

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car!!!

Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car!!!

by Gina Valley

Welcome to Graduation!

Please leave your forks in your car.

Because, let’s face it, you will want to stab someone, and all that just ruins the post-graduation family photos, not to mention what it does to your chance of getting to The Cheesecake Factory before the wait for a table starts pushing 3 hours.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car Graduation PatienceYou will need a chair. Fortunately, chairs have been provided for you.

Unfortunately, the chairs are 6 inch wide, folding chairs, made out of cheap plastic. Their plastic becomes pliable during the requisite 1000 degree graduation day heat, and thus the chairs are prone to give-way and collapse with no warning.

Not only does the heat increase the chairs’ “likeliness-to-suffer-structural-failure” quotient, it also makes the chairs cranky, resulting in a high incidence of chair-on-sitter violence, manifested as frequent incidents of spontaneous chair foldings.

This ensures that occupants of those chairs which do not suffer a sudden collapse due to structural failure within the flimsy plastic architecture will still possibly have the joy of experiencing a spontaneous self-folding of their chair the exact moment they sneeze, reach for a camera, or have a butterfly land on their leg.

It’s really a race to see which happens first: self-folding or total catastrophic collapse. If you look around the audience carefully you’ll notice people placing bets on the outcome of that race, particularly if the chair occupant is one whom is gifted with larger than average gravitational attraction.

There will be a sea of these low-quality, miniature, self-folding, likely-to-collapse chairs from which to choose. You will spy this vast bastion of seatishness as you approach the designated graduation area, after having completed your mandatory 4 mile hike in from the “Convenient Graduation Day Parking.”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car Graduation Patience

Please note that the touted “Be Sure To Carpool and Catch Our Shuttle To The Actual Graduation Site” shuttle is either an urban legend or invisible. No one has ever been able to find, much less catch a ride from, this mysterious, elusive machine. Plan ahead and wear your hiking boots.

As your gaze sweeps across the expanse of chairs provided for you and the other culmination hostages, also known as “audience members,” it will likely fall upon areas of what appear to be unclaimed seating bounty, some in the most prime seating locations. Do not fall victim to this clever deception. As you attempt to occupy these plastic oases, you’ll find they are already claimed, and seriously guarded, by everything from a strewn sweater to a package of gum to a rabid grandmother.

Perhaps, you’ll wonder how these people managed to secure such excellent seats, seats from which the stage and its occupants are visible. The answer is fairly simple. These people arrived before graduation last year, and simply refused to give up their seats.
Those who were too short-sighted to be on-site 12 months in advance generally secured their seats by gaining employment with the chair rental company, and scheduling themselves to be delivered, already seated in and firmly attached to their chair.

But, don’t worry. There will be plenty of available chairs. Try looking behind any nearby trees, behind the idiot who brought a bouquet of balloons, and behind the basketball team. The seats surrounding the guy with an air-horn, the deodorant deficient dude, and the life insurance salesman are also generally available.

Vendors will be conveniently available around the audience area. Remember, they only take cash. Feel free to bring that $100 bill the grocery store refuses to break for you, because nothing is priced less than $100 anyway.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car Graduation Patience

Unfortunately, the vendors sell useless items, such as teddy bears, flowers, and t-shirts. They will not have the basic graduation ceremony survival items you truly need, such as an extra-large can of Red Bull to help you remain conscious while the keynote speaker waxes on for 3 ½ hours about his vital contributions to the world changing field of blueberry color stabilization.

Or, a gallon jug of Febreze to spray the deodorant deficient dude.

Or, a set of blow darts to take out that giant balloon bouquet the moron four rows in front of you brought, that’s blocking the view of stage for everyone in your section.

Bathrooms are conveniently located 2 miles away, in the direction exactly opposite to where you parked your car. Don’t worry, though. Thanks to your long hike and the heat, you’ll probably be suffering from dehydration and won’t have need of facilities for at least a couple days after the graduation is complete.

When you hear the distant sound of speaker feedback and clarinet music, you will know that the graduation has begun. You’ll see a wave of people filing down the center aisle of the graduation seating area. Several of them will be melting in their asbestos robes and funny hats, and will be dragged down the aisle by other graduates.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car Graduation Patience

The matching goofy graduate garb and giant guy sitting next to you will work together to make it highly unlikely you’ll spot your graduate during this processional. Nonetheless, social mores require you to stand, bobbing and weaving, in a futile attempt to get a clear view of the processional-ists to prove your devotion to your graduate.

But, don’t worry about not spying your graduate on his or her way in. You will, assuming the keynote speaker ever finishes speaking, get to see your graduate march across the stage after his or her name is read. Please note that in this context “read” means “completely mangled and mispronounced to such an extent that even your graduate is not sure who the name card reader is talking about.

Naturally, your efforts to capture forever that look of confusion on your graduate’s face will be hampered by a full memory card, a depleted battery, or both. Fortunately, a professional photographer will be stationed at the exit point of the stage to snap a charming candid photo of your graduate sweating and clutching his or her fake diploma. For only $87.63 you can purchase 2 wallet-sized prints of that photo.

The ceremony should take less than 3 days. Hopefully, you packed a canteen and a snack.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Please Leave Your Forks In Your Car Graduation Patience

You will know the ceremony has ended when the army clad in asbestos begins to march out of the designated graduation area, and people around you begin yelling into their cell phones, “I don’t see you. Do you see me? I’m waving. Do you see me? I don’t see you…”

This is the point in the day when you’ll wish you had set up a predetermined meeting point with your graduate. Some families spend more time trying to find their graduate after the ceremony than it actually took their graduate to complete his or her course of study.

This delay in departure is a critical issue, because for every extra minute that passes before you get to The Cheesecake Factory, the wait for a table increases by another hour.

Of course, if you’re really thinking, you’ll decide to remain in the designated graduation area.

After all, that’s really the only way to get a good seat for next year’s ceremony.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Did you attend any graduation ceremonies this year? Did your chair try to eat you? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Sometimes Juice Spills …Gina’s Favorites

Sometimes Juice Spills …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

I picked my Sometimes Juice Spills post for Throwback Day this week, because it makes me giggle.

Laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Sometimes Juice Spills

You know it’s going to be a good day when you start it off by finding a pimple the size of a can of soup sprouting out of the side of your neck.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Sometimes Juice Spills ...Gina's Favorites Marriage AcneWhere does it fall on the irony scale that I found the pimple while putting on my anti-wrinkle cream?

At first I thought it was a bug bite.  I was hoping it was a bug bite.  But it wasn’t a bug bite.

All doubt was removed when I found his mini-me brother sprouting up from the middle of the scar on my forehead.

If there was another one on the other side of my neck, and it was Halloween, I could have passed it off for a neck bolt.  But, just the one at this time of year leaves little option for disguise.

There is cover up. I coated it with that. Twice. It went from looking like a flare guiding aircraft landing on a carrier in the fog to more like a stubby thumb trying to hitch a ride.

A turtle neck would have covered it. Of course the 90 degree F weather around here this week would have made that less than comfortable. Plus, there’s my obsessive need to not let anything touch my neck.  I hate that feeling, so I don’t even own a turtle neck.

I guess my body didn’t hear about the “nothing touches my neck” rule before it started growing my third arm there.

But, I realized that I was probably making too big a deal out of this. We all focus on our own bodily imperfections, even though most people never notice them, much less give them a second glance. So, I decided not to worry about it and headed down to breakfast.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Sometimes Juice Spills ...Gina's Favorites Marriage Acne

The Professor did a double take as I sat down across from him at the breakfast table. “What the bloody ‘ell is that?” he asked, staring at my neck growth.

“I’m not sure,” I answered. “Might be a bug bite,” I suggested, hopefully.

“I don’t think so,” he said, looking intently at it.

“Does it look like a pimple?” I asked.

He shook his head.  “Not exactly,” he said.  “It looks more like the beginning of an alien emerging.”

Somehow his orange juice got dumped on his lap about then.

I have no idea how that happened.

Sometimes juice spills.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Ever been double “blessed” with the troubles of youth and the pains of aging at the same time?  Is your significant other super helpful when you’re feeling self-conscious?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Click over to my posts below for more fun with The Professor:

WHAT Is The Dog Sniffing Now?!?!

Early Morning Ambush

A Zen-Like Departure

Where’s My Sparkly?

 As always, the extra clicks count as cardio.

Thank you for reading and sharing.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

It’s A Sleep Deprivation Party!!!

It’s A Sleep Deprivation Party!!!

by Gina Valley

One of my kids put herself to bed early last night, because she needed to be up at 7am this morning for the 1st day of summer school. I know it’s shocking to hear of a child willingly going to bed early, but she is one of those rare children who, even as a toddler, would go take a nap when she was tired.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley It's A Sleep Deprivation Party!!! ExhaustionFour of my kids had a sleep-over last night. They spent the night flopped down in our family room, giggling and eating tubs of frosting and chips until 5am this morning.

I was too tired to go downstairs, so I couldn’t give them a stare-of-death to inspire quietness. I couldn’t holler at the anti-sleeping-junk-food-snarfing-sleepover kids to go to sleep, because I’d wake up the sleeping-to-prepare-for–summer-school kid., so the giggling continued.

As the world’s lightest sleeper, I didn’t miss a single “Haha!” “Hee hee!” or “LOL!”

Just as the downstairs din dissipated, The Snore Master, also known as my husband, kicked into high gear at 5:01am, rattling our windows and my last nerve. I rolled him over so many times he nearly fell off the bed, but his sonata of snorting continued unimpeded.

The last time I looked at it before I finally dozed off, our clock read 6:55am.

At 7:00am, I was awakened by someone who I, at first, assumed to be someone who wanted to be strangled. But, as my eyes focused, I realized it was actually my husband telling me “good bye” as he headed off to lecture twenty-something’s about all things scientific.

As I stumbled down the hall telling him goodbye & making sure my summer school attendee was conscious and vertical, I noticed that mixed into the pile of sleeping children on our family room floor was our dogs.

Even our dogs were too tired to stand up.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley It's A Sleep Deprivation Party!!! Exhaustion

Clearly, 5 minutes sleep is not enough sleep for anyone.

I’m not telling you this so you’ll feel sorry for me. Believe me, I’ve already fired up enough self-pity for myself to last me for the next couple months.

I’m telling you this because somewhere nearby in our quiet, little neighborhood someone is doing something which involves a large piece of construction equipment going back and forth, repeatedly.

And, as large pieces of construction equipment are apt to have, this one has an alarm which, for safety’s sake, beeps while it’s backing up. I’m sure of this because for the last hour and a half this large piece of construction equipment has beeped 10-20 times a minute. Every minute.

So, it’s important I share this information with you, because, if whoever is driving that large piece of construction equipment with the excellent safety-ensuring beeper, continues to do so, I will be stabbing them with a fork, and I’ll need you to read this to the judge at my sentencing hearing.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

How do you handle a lack of sleep? Why do they call them “slumber parties” when no one slumbers? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing what you think.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out

Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out

by Gina Valley

My children’s school year draws to a close this week. And, along with it, many of the games I played on a daily basis.

My pack worked hard to develop these games to keep me busy. They didn’t want me to have free time on my hands, and end up joining a gang. They’re givers. Truly givers.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out Summer School BreakI’ll miss playing Guess What’s Behind Door #1. I loved the feeling I’d get when I returned home from taking my kids to school, walked into our entryway, and saw a backpack, a stack of textbooks, a musical instrument or two, and various sports paraphernalia there, all of which were, apparently, invisible to my pack as they rushed out through that same entry way on their way to school.

I’ll have to do without the heart-racing challenge of Beat The “I Forgot…” Call. Each morning, upon returning home after delivering my progeny to their various educational institutions, I’d dash into my office and race to finish whatever work was pushing its deadline that day before I’d get the “I Forgot” call or IFC, as I like to call it. The question was not “Will I get the IFC?” The question was how many IFC’s I would get.

I’d get at least one IFC every morning. Sometimes I’d get two or even three. Once I got eight, which is an especially impressive display of forgetfulness on the part of my offspring, since there are only seven of them.

It’s hard to say who will miss playing Guess What Your Kid Did? more, me or the school principals. I’ve had surprise bonding sessions with the principals at each of my children’s school in order to answer a variety of questions, most of which start with “Mrs. Valley, are you aware that your child…?” …had a Samuari sword in her locker? …is the only 2nd grader wearing 4’heels? …disconnected the water pipe from the sink in the students’ bathroom? …brought a boa constrictor to home economics? …glued the substitute teacher to a chair? …filled all of the violins with squirty cheese?

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out Summer School BreakTo which I always answered as honestly as I could, “I’m sorry, but you’ve dialed the wrong number.”

And, who could forget that ‘ole favorite memory game Oh, Good, It’s Due Tomorrow? Be it with a diorama of Dora the Explorer, or a 10-page research paper about procrastination, my kids kept me entertained by never starting, much less telling me about, any project until the night before it was due.

If art supplies, poster board, or glue sticks were required, they wouldn’t mention a project until the last store within a hundred mile radius had closed for the night. They’re confident in my ability to play and win the expert level of this game.

I’m not sure how I’ll work on sharpening my dull seamstress skills now that I won’t be playing Project I Need It Today. Having to come up with the appropriate garb for school spirit days, with a maximum of 4 minutes notice, helped me hone my “Make it work!” skills.

“Reflective Day” and “Dress Like Your Favorite Farm Animal Day” were especially tough challenges. Apparently, they meant literally reflective and literally a barn animal. My lightening-speed production of a Socrates costume and an outfit to make them look like their hillbilly cousin Ned didn’t qualify. Who knew?

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out Summer School BreakEven though my FitBit never counted it, I always assumed I got more than enough cardio in for the day while playing The Amazing Shoe Search. Before I had children, I assumed this kind of problem ended with pre-school. My 14 year old shot yet another hole through that theory just last week when he was about to get out of our van at school before he realized he didn’t have any shoes with him, much less on his feet.

And, just so you know, having to return home to get a pair of shoes does not an excused tardy make. Nor, a happy mom.

I counted on Truth Or Dare, with its soul-searching and philosophical debates, to keep my mind and principles clear. Every Friday, my 13 year old son would ask me to sign his reading log, which indicated he had read the assigned book about a girl growing up in medieval England for 30 minutes daily. He didn’t read the assigned book about a girl growing up in medieval England for 30 minutes daily. He scanned the chapter at best. I knew he was lying. He knew I knew he was lying.

So, why did I sign it? Because, it says at the top of the form that reading is the most important step in educating oneself, and I know he spent nearly 20 hours each week reading everything from Birds of North America to Sports Illustrated to The Lightening Thief. And, because I’ve read that book about the girl from Medieval England and it was lousy.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out Summer School Break

I supposed I’ll have to take up reading the dictionary daily now that I won’t be playing my daily game of Who Wants To Define “Ready For School”? At 7:30am, every morning, my pack was supposed to be ready for school. At 7:30am, every morning, the majority of my pack would tell me they were ready for school. At 7:30am, every morning not a single member of my pack was actually ready for school. Ever.

At 7:30am, every morning, I’d remind my pack what “Ready For School” meant. Naked isn’t “Ready For School”. Boxers-only isn’t “Ready For School”. Still in the shower isn’t “Ready For School”. Painting the dog’s toenails isn’t “Ready For School.” Wearing yesterday’s dirty clothes isn’t “Ready For School”. Screaming at the printer isn’t “Ready for School.” Looking for a pair of shoes to wear isn’t “Ready For School.”

Come to think of it, I don’t think I dropped a single kid off at school all year, who was actually “Ready For School.”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Games I’ll Miss When School’s Out Summer School BreakBut, I think the game I’ll miss the most, which is, ironically, all about the “missing,” is Have You Seen My…?:  School Edition.  There are editions of this game for every occasion and activity, but the School Edition is the one I play most frequently. Have you seen my…math book, trumpet, field trip permission slip, class’ hamster I brought home for the weekend, lab report about rotten eggs, box of rotten eggs…?

Thankfully, my children, ever the thoughtful creatures that they are, have already started setting up games for me to keep busy playing all summer.

Why just this morning I received a notice from the school library informing me it’s time to play What Do You Mean You Never Checked Out That Book? and How Can They Charge Us $94 For A Paper Back Picture Book?

Let the games begin!

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

What games will you miss when school breaks for summer? Do you have any summer games planned? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing what you think.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

Laugh along with this timely Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break

In about a week, I’ll be under full time siege.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break ...Gina's FavoritesThat’s right.

My kids will be on summer break.

I love having them home. I love getting to hang out with them. I love not having to mess with homework.

But.

A few issues have come up in the past during the summer occupation, so I know I need to be proactive and take vital steps before my garrison of gigglers ends its daily constitution in the halls of education.

Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break

#10.  Round up a dairy cow – On a hot summer day 6 gallons of milk is easily inhaled by my kids. When their friends have joined our circus we need a keg of the white stuff daily. I figure having our own cow has got to be cheaper than buying jugs by the pallet full at Costco.

#9.  Get a HazMat suit – And, it needs to include asbestos gloves and a breathing apparatus. I don’t know how bathing suits and towels used in a chlorinated pool turn into alien life forms so quickly, but they do. It’s like my off spring drop their bathing suits and towels off into a pile, and the fabric springs into an instant mildewy mess.

#8.  Remove the doors from the refrigerator & freezer – They aren’t shut once the entire summer any way. At least this way there’ll be fewer heads and fingers slammed in them. It’s worth the perpetually melted ice cream if it saves me even one trip to the emergency room.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break ...Gina's Favorites#7.Hook the power car washer onto the hose to shower the kids – When it’s light until well past a decent bedtime, no one wants to come inside, much less do so to bathe. This way I can do a quick turbo wash as they run by in the midst of a game of tag. I might get the wax cylinder to, so they’ll be extra shiny and water repellant.

#6.  Stock up on swim goggles – I’ll start with about 50 pairs. That should almost last us through the first week. Where do all the goggles disappear to? If we ever move I think we’re going to find a hidden room full of swim goggles. And, how come my kids consider diving into mud puddles totally hygienic, but need protection from the clean, bacteria-free water in a pool?

#5.  Purchase 3 identical pairs of flip flops for each member of my pack - That way they should be able to come up with at least one pair of shoes when required to. It’s ok to wear flip flops to a cousin’s black tie wedding as long as they’re sparkly, right?

#4.  Hide the snow parkas - Why does someone always think it’d be cool to play Arctic Explorer in the mid-July heat? And, why do they think rolling around in a giant mud puddle in their dry clean only parkas simulates the arctic? I think the school district should be held responsible for that dry cleaning bill.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Vital Preps Before My Kids Start Summer Break ...Gina's Favorites#3.  Install revolving doors at all entrances - It’s our only hope for having even a semi good chance at a closed door. It’d be nice if we could at least keep the dumber mosquitos and June bugs out.

#2.  Procure a case of MRE’s – Or, maybe several cases. Those nasty nutrition packs from the military surplus store are “Meals Ready To Eat” (also known as “”Meals Refusing To Exit,” according to some of my favorite soldiers). Hopefully, they’ll be better than the nothing I’ve prepared on those many nights when I forget to make dinner because it’s light until nearly 9:30pm. Who thinks about dinner while it’s still light?

#1.  Buy snow boots for everyone - This is the only time of year stores in SoCal have them in stock. Gotta get ‘em while it’s hot.

Now that I think about it, I should probably stop by Costco for a barrel of sunscreen, even though I know my kids will refuse to use it all summer.

I wonder if they make a sunscreen cartridge for the power car washer.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

How do you prep for the summer? Did you miss school during the summer when you were a kid?  Shoot me a comment. You’re here anyway, and I’d love to hear what you have to say.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!! …Gina’s Favorites

Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!! …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

As we celebrate Memorial Day, laugh along with this timely Gina’s Favorites post.

Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!!

One year we decided, because we are stupid, stupid people, that it would be fun, educational, and inspiring to take our 7 children, 6 of whom were 6 years old and under at the time, to the Veteran’s Cemetery for the Memorial Day service.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!! ...Gina's FavoritesEach Memorial Day Boy Scouts place a flag on each and every grave there.  You have to see it in person to grasp the grandeur of the gesture.  It gives you pause.

But, let’s be honest, nothing gives a preschooler pause. Preschoolers don’t pause.

I don’t know why we were thinking our littles would somehow undergo a miraculous, if temporary, transformation, into people with the desire to sit still and do as they’re told.  We must’ve had concussions from being kicked in the head by our two year old each night, after he’d wander into our room to sleep with us “’cause Matthew’s snowin’ again.”

We should have remembered our kids have always prided themselves on taking all instructions under advisement.  Of course, they define “taking under advisement” as “ignoring.”

Standing in the center of the vast, green acres with my pack, surrounded by headstones and people there to honor what those headstones stand for, reminded me there are people, many of them in fact, who put their lives on the line for what they believe in.

It reminded me, as my 94 year old WWII veteran Great Uncle says, freedom isn’t free.

And, it reminded me to leave our kids at home the next time.

I could see our six year old eyeing the neat rows of head stones, and I knew what he was thinking before the little human monkey even said it.  There is no good answer when your 6 year old asks you, “How many [headstones] do you think I can jump to in a row without falling?”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!! ...Gina's FavoritesI wanted to say, “Well, I’m not sure, but please don’t try it until I have one, OK?” But, that seemed inappropriate.

As the speaker mentioned soldiers “making the ultimate sacrifice” my 5 year old asked if Ultimate Sacrifice was one of the X-Men.  Before I could answer, my 6 year old blurted out, “No, Stupid. It means they’re dead people.”

“Are the dead people here?” my 5 year old daughter asked, excitement rising in her voice.  I knew she was thinking about silly zombies, like on Scooby Doo.

I noticed my 4 year old daughter, who was not at that point a fan of zombies, Scooby Doo type or otherwise, immediately pulled her dangling feet up onto her chair, and surveyed the surrounding grass for disturbances.  We were the only disturbances

I smelled a strong, repugnant odor, and immediately suspected my one year old.  Despite his loud protests and claims of innocence, I lifted him and performed the traditional fanny sniff check.  I found that he was not the offender, and slid him back into his stroller.

But, I didn’t have to wonder who was responsible for very long. My adorable 3 year old daughter, Charlotte, announced loudly enough for everyone in attendance and in residence to hear, as she pointed to the man standing next to me, “Mommy, that man farted!”

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!! ...Gina's FavoritesTo which, my 4 year old, Gemma, responded even louder, so as to call upon her full authority, “We don’t say ‘fart,’ Charlotte. That’s crass.  He tooted. He made a stinky, stinky toot!” At which point, I wondered if it was possible to enlist and ship out within the hour.

Charlotte showed her appreciation for her sister’s guidance by knocking Gemma down.  Gemma then, the more agile of the 2, wriggled out from under her bigger, younger sister and socked her right in the left eye.

As The Professor and I pulled apart our delicate, feminine, brawling flowers, we realized it was time to surrender.  We each slung a screaming sister over one of our shoulders, and each grabbed a stroller to push on the long walk back to our van.

Our 5, 6, and 11 year olds all followed along.  Our 2 year old turned and ran in the opposite direction.

I called after him to come get into his stroller. He ran faster. In the opposite direction.  He didn’t seem the slightest bit concerned that we’d started the long march back toward our van without him.

But, when I waved the bag I’d filled with Fruit Roll Ups, he came running.  He had his priorities. He might not have had them straight, but he definitely had them.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Stop Stepping On Their Heads!!! ...Gina's FavoritesOur one year old, a big fan of Fruit Roll Ups, who spoke only in sign language at the time, immediately, threw his head back, opened his mouth like a hungry baby bird, and repeatedly made the sign for food.

And, the sign for ceiling fan. He really loved ceiling fans.

I noticed that our 11 year old was slowly, but ever so purposely, moving himself further away from the rest of us.  I was glad he didn’t have keys to the van, fearing he would take off and leave our embarrassing family circus behind. Our 3 year old noticed his progress across turf, also, but she wasn’t happy with his course.

She screamed to her big brother, “Stop it!  You’re stepping on their heads!”

Every person and most of the squirrels in the entire cemetery turn in our direction.

I scanned the surrounding area, hoping to spy an open grave I could climb into.

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

Have you ever caused pandemonium in a cemetery?  How do you observe Memorial Day? Shoot me a comment. I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.

Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot …Gina’s Favorites

Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot …Gina’s Favorites

by Gina Valley

For Throwback Day this week, laugh along with this Gina’s Favorites post.

Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot

Bear, our boy puppy, came into our bedroom and barked at me at 3:00AM this morning.  This might not have been quite so jarring had I not been up until 2:00AM waiting for my 17 year old to arrive home from Disneyland.

I can’t sleep when my kids aren’t home. Of course, if last night is any indication, I can’t sleep when they are either.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot ...Gina's Favorites Sleep DeprivationApparently, Bear, our giant pup, was lonely.  He finally settled down about 4:00AM, at which point his sister, Ziva, jump onto our bed. I think she was there to complain about her litter mate being so loud. Then, she remembered how much she likes to bounce on our bed, and proceeded to work on her technique, on and off, for the next hour.

At 5:00AM, our youngest son proved he was right last night when he said that he could get up early, even though he was up 2 hours past his bedtime, by climbing onto our bed to chat.  “Since we’re both awake, mom,” he said, “can you play Colossus on the piano for me again? I forgot how it goes, and I have a test on it during band today.”

I explained to my young son that, no, I would not play the song right then.

It was 5:00AM. We’d already had both barking and bouncing dogs. If I started pounding on the piano, I was sure that not only would all of his brothers and sisters turn into zombies, but that our neighbors would likely storm our house with pitchforks and torches.

I did not explain to him that I also could not play the piece right then. My lack of sleep was making it nearly impossible for me to get both of my eyes to stay open at the same time. There was no way I was going to be able to coordinate 2 hands along with my eyes to produce the song written on the page.

I tried humming Colossus for him, but it came out sounding like Oh, Come, All Ye Faithful.

A few minutes later he was blasting Colossus on our TV, having accessed the internet through the Xbox, and I was pretty sure I could hear our neighbors groaning.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot ...Gina's Favorites Sleep DeprivationI finally got to sleep for about an hour before I had to get up to get my pack moving for school. But, an hour just wasn’t enough sleep to let my body, much less my brain, reset.

I had tossed the bowls my kids used for breakfast into the trash can, and loaded the empty cereal box into our dishwasher before I realized what I was doing.  Of course, that’s not the only telltale sign that my brain is exhausted, and needs a hard reboot.

Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot

#10.  I was yelling at my children to hurry or they’ll be late to school even though they’d already left for school.

#9.  I keep catching myself typing with spaces between syllables, instead of between the words.

#8.  I just spelled “between” wrong. Three times.

#7.  I also spelled “syllables” wrong. Many, many times.

#6.  I was yelling at the dog to come downstairs. Turns out, he was sitting on my feet, and I was downstairs at the time. I think the dog rolled his eyes at me.

Humor Funny Humorous Family Life Love Laugh Laughter Parenting Mom Moms Dad Dads Parenting Child Kid Kids Children Son Sons Daughter Daughters Brother Brothers Sister Sisters Grandparent Grandma Grandpa Grandparents Grandfather Grandmother Parenting Gina Valley Top 10 Signs My Brain Needs A Hard Reboot ...Gina's Favorites Sleep Deprivation#5.  I have been seriously considering using a fork to stab the guy whose truck keeps making that stupid back up beeping noise I’ve been hearing on and off all morning. Make up your mind. Park your stupid truck, and get away from it. Some of us have had no sleep.

#4.  I was completely immobilized while trying to put on my bathrobe because a sleeve was inside out.  This is why it’s important to have 911 on speed dial.

#3.  I keep needing to Google simple facts, and then forgetting what I was gonna Google before I can open Google.

#2.  I asked a client, who I know lives less than an hour away from me, what time it is where he lives. To his credit, he immediately asked me what color the sky is on my planet.

#1.  I just now, an hour after she left, realized why I liked the black jacket my 16 year old daughter was wearing when she left for school.  Because it’s mine.

Is it nap o’clock yet?

Laugh Out Loud!

-gina

How can you tell when your brain needs a hard reboot?  Have you done anything goofy because you were tired?  Shoot me a comment.  I’m looking forward to hearing all about it.

Photos courtesy of Stock.xchng – Used with permission.